Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-21
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
People are living longer today than at any other time in history due to improvements in healthcare, nutrition, and living standards. While some argue that elder people create problems for government by putting burden by providing the welfare schemes and pensions. However, some believe that their presence is beneficial for our society. In this essay, I will discuss the advantages and disadvantages and share my point of view.
One of the major drawbacks an aging population creates an increased economic pressure on the government. They spend huge financial figure on pensions, healthcare and elderly care services. An aged person surrounded with more diseases and health concerns. As a result, authorities invested more on hospitals by providing advanced tools and equipment, such as CT scan, X-ray machines, MRI scanners and ultrasound machines, as well as basic healthcare facilities. These services should be made available not only in urban areas but also in rural communities. For example, in India, the government has to allocate substantial funds to upgrade public hospitals and provide specialized medical equipment to meet the need of elderly people. Consequently, an ageing population can place considerable pressure on public finances.
On the other hand, an older person would be beneficial to society as they hold years of living experience and professional skills. They can guide their families, the younger generation while choosing subjects, to showcase any presentation in office or several life time guidance. Many retire people, join services as a volunteer, or work as a part time advisor, to guide the young generation through leading workshops and sharing their own expertise and life lessons. For instance, instead of ideally sitting home, one can join and become advisor in their own professional line. Therefore, it is evident that, an aging population helps our society in several good ways.
In conclusion, although an aging population presents challenges such as increased healthcare costs and more costing in welfare schemes. However, an older population plays important role in our society as their life lessons, expertise and constant guidance become our support in tough time. Therefore, I believe the advantages of an aging population outweigh its disadvantages to a considerable extent.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing both sides of the argument and a clear personal position. The ideas are relevant, such as the economic burden on healthcare and the social value of elderly experience. However, the development of these ideas is somewhat superficial. For instance, the discussion on healthcare costs could be more nuanced, and the examples provided, while relevant, are a bit generic. The position is consistent throughout, but the essay would benefit from deeper analysis of the long-term societal implications to reach a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5
The essay is logically organized into clear paragraphs, each with a central theme. There is a clear progression of ideas from the introduction to the conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'On the other hand,' 'For instance,' and 'Consequently,' which help guide the reader. However, some transitions are slightly mechanical, and there are minor issues with sentence-level cohesion, such as the awkward phrasing in the introduction ('putting burden by providing'). Overall, the paragraphing is appropriate and the flow is generally smooth.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the writer to express ideas clearly. There are attempts to use topic-specific vocabulary like 'welfare schemes,' 'public finances,' and 'professional skills.' However, there are some inaccuracies in word choice and collocation, such as 'huge financial figure' (should be 'expenditure' or 'sums'), 'an aged person surrounded with more diseases' (should be 'prone to'), and 'ideally sitting home' (should be 'idly'). These errors do not impede communication but limit the precision of the writing.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the meaning is always clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement and sentence fragments. For example, 'While some argue that elder people create problems... However, some believe...' is a sentence fragment issue. There are also errors like 'Many retire people' (should be 'retired') and 'more costing in welfare schemes' (should be 'higher costs'). Despite these errors, the writer demonstrates a sufficient range of structures to convey complex ideas, and the errors rarely cause confusion.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.