Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

The individuals of elderly people are blessings for our generation. Right now, the age of many individuals are getting longer over the years. Many people believe that population of aged people are becoming issues for governments. Other individual say that if society has further aged people then it will advantage. The argument stated that having an aging individuals outweigh the advantages.

In my opinion, the people of higher ages quite be impossible to be handle by government, if there population increasing day by day. As the population of aged escalated, the resources will be utilizing further. For instance, those countries where the natural resources are less, then it will be hard for the government to reserve resources for the adults and childrens.

On the other side, the peoples are getting married frequently, so population of newborn is increasing by past few years. To create the balance of life, population of aged people must decrease so the newcomers can fulfill their space. Another challenge for governments is to provide accomodations for all the individuals. If members of family increase, the requirement of bigger houses rise.

In contrast, The aged people have some advantages. First, the experience of elderly people in industries or in life is quite useful many times. They can teach youngster that how to deal with the problems, that they would be experience soon. Second, they are the blessings of our life. The way of their love is different from the parents.

In conclusion, the increase in population of elderly individuals can outweigh the advantages. The population definitely a problem for the government.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt, but the development of ideas is limited and sometimes contradictory. While you state your opinion that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages, the supporting arguments are underdeveloped. For instance, the point about 'newcomers' needing to 'fulfill their space' is unclear and lacks logical connection to the aging population debate. Additionally, the essay contains some confusion regarding the prompt's core question, as the conclusion contradicts the earlier body paragraphs by not clearly synthesising the points made. To improve, ensure each paragraph focuses on a single, well-explained argument with concrete examples.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or inaccurate. Phrases like 'On the other side' and 'In contrast' are used, but the logical flow between sentences is frequently disrupted by grammatical errors and awkward phrasing. The referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the second paragraph where the link between natural resources and the elderly is not fully explained. Improving the use of transition signals and ensuring that each sentence logically follows the previous one will significantly enhance the coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is generally limited and repetitive. There are frequent errors in word choice and collocation, such as 'the individuals of elderly people' instead of 'the elderly population' and 'it will advantage' instead of 'it will be advantageous'. You rely on basic vocabulary, and there is little evidence of less common lexical items or idiomatic expressions. To reach a higher band, you should focus on learning collocations (e.g., 'demographic shift' or 'strain on public services') and using more precise terminology to describe social and economic concepts related to the topic.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text that occasionally impede communication. Issues include subject-verb agreement ('the age of many individuals are', 'population of aged people are'), incorrect verb forms ('quite be impossible to be handle'), and awkward sentence structures. While you attempt some complex sentences, they are often faulty, leading to confusion. The punctuation is generally functional, but the overall control of grammar is weak. You should focus on mastering basic sentence construction, specifically subject-verb agreement and the correct use of passive voice, before attempting more complex structures.

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