Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In the modern era, people are able to lead a long life than expected. Some argue that over population of elderly people might create inconvinience for government. Others argue that it is an advangtage for society to have more old people. I strongly believe that advantages of having an aging population will outweigh the disadvantages. The life they lead and the wisdom they posess will definetly inspire younger generations.

Aging population will lead to over population of people which create problems like housing and job crisis. Moreover, government will need to create extra retirement funds for elderly people which will create financial problems. Over a period of time old people might become a burden to their family members and might be placed in old age homes. For example, old age homes these days are mostly filled with people that are aged above 70 years.

However, the knowledge and wisdom elderly people share will inspire younger generations. The retirement funds they get from the government will benefit their family. Grandparents can help raise their grandsons and granddaughters, so that their parents are able to work without any inconvinience. Our generation parents will definetly enjoy their parent's company and lead a happy life. For example, children who grow in the presence of their grandparents are the most happiest kids.

In conclusion, although aging population creates problems for governments, families will lead a happy life as their family members are able to live a very long life. From my perspective, the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention economic burdens and the benefits of wisdom, these points are not fully extended with sufficient depth or specific evidence. For instance, the mention of 'housing and job crisis' is a broad assertion that lacks a clear link to an aging population. To reach a higher band, ensure that each main point is supported by a more detailed explanation or a more concrete, illustrative example rather than general statements. The conclusion effectively summarizes your stance, but the overall argument remains somewhat superficial.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, each with a clear focus. You use some cohesive devices such as 'Moreover', 'However', and 'In conclusion' to signal shifts in your argument. However, the flow between sentences is occasionally mechanical, and some transitions feel repetitive. For example, the transition between the benefits of retirement funds and the role of grandparents in the third paragraph is abrupt. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that ideas within paragraphs are more tightly connected would enhance the overall coherence of your writing.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

Your vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing you to convey your meaning clearly. However, there are several spelling errors (e.g., 'inconvinience', 'posess', 'definetly') and some word choice issues, such as 'over population of people' which is redundant. You rely on fairly common vocabulary; to improve, try to incorporate more precise, topic-specific collocations related to demographics and socio-economic impacts. While the range is sufficient to communicate your ideas, the lack of sophisticated or less common lexical items limits your score in this criterion.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

You demonstrate a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While your meaning is generally clear, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with articles ('the government', 'an aging population') and subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'children who grow... are the most happiest kids'—a double superlative error). Punctuation is generally functional, but there are minor slips throughout. To improve, focus on mastering the use of articles and ensuring that complex sentences are constructed without errors. Increasing the variety of your sentence structures while maintaining accuracy will help you achieve a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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