Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

One of the most important trend in today's world is a colossal upsurge in number of people believing that it has been reported that across the globe that lifespan of individual is longer older creates challenges for officials and few have different view benefit for senior citizens.

Although this development has both advantages and disadvantages following will be covered with help of suitable examples.

One major advantage is "Major Experience, Skills" which has multiple benefits into different fields. For example for mostly specialist doctors in Heart or Liver, Kidneys bone, eyes, mostly are senior citizens as they have very good hands-on skills to provide treatments surgeries for the patients, therefore maximum pupil prefernce is to get checked from most senior medical practioner. Hence mostly get best treatment guidance leads to longer life.

The main disadvantages is on the other hand from government there are certain medical, health, travel, incometax rebates facilities are there which impact the economic growth hence few thought it creates problems. For example, in travel older get reservation prefernce that's too in discounted price, Similarly, there are certain types of pensions available which going through nation resulting in budging issue due to longer life then before.

After pondering above reviews for both there frormal parts has been discussed and explained with examples to both have its own advantages and disadvantages towards the nation. Hence from both perspective views and examples has been provided.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.0
Coherence and Cohesion5.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.0

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The essay fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, which significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you identify both advantages and disadvantages, the position is not clearly maintained throughout the response. The introduction is confusing and lacks a clear thesis statement. The body paragraphs provide some relevant examples, such as the expertise of senior medical practitioners and the economic burden of pensions, but these points are under-developed and lack depth. Because the response is under-length and the arguments are not fully extended, it does not meet the requirements for a higher band score.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay is organised into paragraphs, but the logical flow is often disrupted by awkward phrasing and a lack of clear cohesive devices. Transitions between sentences are frequently mechanical or missing, making the progression of ideas difficult to follow. For instance, the transition 'After pondering above reviews' is unnatural and does not effectively link the conclusion to the preceding arguments. Referencing is sometimes unclear, and the overall structure feels disjointed. To improve, focus on using a wider variety of linking words (e.g., 'furthermore', 'consequently', 'in contrast') to connect your ideas more fluidly.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and often imprecise. There are several instances of awkward word choices and incorrect collocations, such as 'colossal upsurge in number of people' and 'maximum pupil prefernce'. Some terms are used incorrectly, such as 'budging issue' (likely intended to be 'budgetary issue') and 'frormal parts'. The range of vocabulary is insufficient to express complex ideas clearly. To reach a higher band, you should work on using more precise academic vocabulary and ensuring that words are used in their correct context.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay contains frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede communication. There are issues with subject-verb agreement (e.g., 'One of the most important trend'), missing articles, and awkward sentence structures. The use of complex sentences is limited and often results in errors, such as the run-on sentence in the introduction. Punctuation is also inconsistent, particularly with the use of commas and capitalization. To improve, focus on mastering basic sentence construction and proofreading for common errors like pluralisation and article usage before attempting more complex structures.

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