Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many countries, death rate has been declined as it was before. Some In this essay we will discuss the benefits and drawbacks of having an aging population.

In many places, humans are now living longer as compared to the past. The reason might indicate the healthy diets and regular physical activities of people nowadays as every other person is health conscious. For example, in my country people consume a healthy diet containing nutrients and protein in it. There are some drawbacks of having senior citizens. The major problem that aging community might create for the government and local residents is that they need constant care and support, whereas there are not enough facilities for people of this age group. There are very few healthcare facilities for people who are 80 and above years of age. For instance, there is no cure for patients suffering from dementia, which can cause problems for government. Another disadvantage for government is that these patients face difficulty in accommodation as it is difficult for them to be in one place for a longer period of time. This is because they could not follow a fixed routine. There is no proper shelter for elderly people who have been disowned by their families.

Whereas a common belief is that citizens who are 70 years and above are beneficial for us. A significant factor contributing this belief is that these elder humans are guidance for us. Another benefit is that they are passing down cultural traditions. For instance, nowadays young adults are not aware of old norms and traditions and seek guidance from their elders as the older generation helps young professionals through their experience and knowledge.

In conclusion, the disadvantages outweigh the advantages as senior citizens might face a lot of crises.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5

The essay addresses the prompt by discussing both the benefits and drawbacks of an aging population. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. While you mention healthcare and cultural traditions, the arguments lack depth and specific evidence. For instance, the claim that elderly people have difficulty with accommodation because they 'could not follow a fixed routine' is unclear and lacks logical support. Additionally, the conclusion is very brief and does not fully synthesize the points made. To improve, ensure each body paragraph contains a clear topic sentence followed by a well-explained example that directly relates to the prompt's core question regarding whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5

The essay is organized into paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is often mechanical or repetitive. Phrases like 'Another disadvantage' and 'Another benefit' are used to transition between points, but the logical flow between sentences within paragraphs is sometimes disjointed. For example, the transition from discussing healthcare facilities to the difficulty of accommodation is abrupt. To reach a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and ensure that each sentence logically follows from the previous one, creating a more cohesive argument throughout the text.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The vocabulary used is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic phrasing, such as 'healthy diets' and 'senior citizens'. There are also some awkward collocations, such as 'death rate has been declined' (should be 'has declined') and 'elder humans' (which sounds unnatural). To improve, try to incorporate more sophisticated vocabulary related to the topic, such as 'demographic shift', 'intergenerational knowledge transfer', or 'socio-economic burden'. Expanding your range of synonyms and focusing on natural collocations will significantly enhance your lexical score.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5

The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'death rate has been declined' (passive voice error), 'contributing this belief' (missing preposition 'to'), and 'these elder humans are guidance for us' (incorrect word choice). While the meaning is generally understandable, the frequency of these errors prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. Focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement, correct preposition usage, and ensuring that your sentence structures are grammatically sound before attempting more complex forms.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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