Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
In contemporary society, elderly people are living longer than ever before has become a highly debated issue. While a segment of people claim that they have created problems for the government, others strongly oppose this notion. In this essay, certain adverse ramifications associated with this development cannot be entirely overlooked; it is widely maintained that its advantages outweigh its disadvantages.
To commence with, the compelling reason for supporting the benefit is that older people are a form of blessing for society. Individuals think that
they have deep knowledge about anything, which we ask from them, as they seen the world with their naked eyes. In addition, elderly individual can
easily guide them in choosing the path in the right direction. For example, in community, grandparents play a crucial role for building a nation when people are unaware about the reality, they acknowledge them about its pros and cons, and give young people a reality check about the exact situation. Hence, people find it easier to cope up with the circumstances and lead them to take a decision without any hesitation.
Furthermore, in educational institutes, there are numerous history subjects, which nowadays young generations find it tough to learn and memorize it, especially dates about the different events. Senior citizens lead learners in providing a detail understanding from their own experience by making such scenarios, after which younger people show a keen interest in learning that course. For example, children who have their grandparents at home take a full advantage of knowing about the historical events, and it makes the subject fascinating to learn at home rather in school. Therefore, it boosts adolescents knowledge and pass their exams with flying colors.
However, we cannot deny the fact that ageing population causes an issue for authorities. As government maintain a yearly record of all citizens, they find it difficult to manage the overpopulation of older people. To cite an example, Census are collected and database is generated to know the exact number of people
living in the respective country, so mostly they make a mistake while handling it. Nevertheless, these concerns are often overstated. With effective management and prudent utilization, mature individuals are still yield far better benefits than drawbacks.
To sum up, although this development entails certain drawbacks such as managing the database and keep a check and balance while recording census, it remains predominantly advantageous. On balance, the benefits it offers clearly surpass its potential drawbacks, making it a positive and prospective approach in modern community.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 6.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 6.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0
The essay addresses all parts of the prompt and maintains a clear position throughout. The arguments regarding the benefits of an aging population are well-developed, particularly the role of the elderly in providing wisdom and historical context. However, the discussion of the disadvantages is somewhat weak and lacks depth; the argument about government census management is not a strong or representative example of the societal challenges posed by an aging population. While the position is clear, the development of the 'disadvantages' side could be more robust to better balance the essay.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used throughout, such as 'To commence with,' 'Furthermore,' and 'To sum up.' However, some transitions are slightly mechanical or awkward, such as 'cope up with' or the phrasing in the final paragraph. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct ideas. The progression of ideas is generally clear, though some sentences within paragraphs feel slightly disjointed due to minor grammatical issues that affect the flow.
Lexical Resource — Band 6.0
The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task. There are attempts to use less common items like 'adverse ramifications,' 'prudent utilization,' and 'prospective approach.' However, there are several instances of imprecise word choice and collocation errors, such as 'acknowledge them about its pros and cons' (should be 'inform them'), 'cope up with' (should be 'cope with'), and 'making such scenarios' (should be 'creating such scenarios'). These errors do not impede communication but prevent the essay from reaching a higher band.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0
The essay uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. While the student attempts complex sentences, there are frequent grammatical errors, particularly with subject-verb agreement ('elderly individual can easily guide,' 'government maintain a yearly record') and article usage. Some sentences are slightly awkward, such as 'they have deep knowledge about anything, which we ask from them, as they seen the world with their naked eyes.' Despite these errors, the meaning remains clear throughout, and the punctuation is generally functional.
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