Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-08-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Some people argue that aging population creates problems for governments, while other believe there are advantages if society has more elderly people. I personally think there is no way that advantages outweigh the disadvantages, because people at such age do not play a vital role in the development of society creating problems for government.
Having elderly people create more troubles than benefits. In many countries, after the retirement age government pays, the retirement allowance to such people which can over burden the authorities as those people do not add their value further more in the progress of the nation. Moreover their medical is free in hospitals, they can avail free transport facility putting pressure on the local bodies. After retirement they become burden on their children. They have no time to keep them engaged.
In addition to that, elder people are far more unaware of the changing technology. They have to be taught about the latest technologies to keep them updated about the changing world so they can play a positive role in the society. These people are mostly slow while performing their tasks as compared to the young people. Young minds produces good and better results than aged people. In most of the countries work places are changing their employees from experienced to fresh and young people.
In conclusion, I firmly believe that having elderly people in country creates more issues than advantages and this is the reason this can never outweigh the advantages of having elderly people in the country.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by taking a clear position that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. However, the development is limited and relies on sweeping generalizations. The argument that elderly people 'do not play a vital role' or 'become a burden' lacks nuance and fails to consider the social, cultural, or economic contributions of the elderly, such as childcare, volunteering, or historical knowledge. The ideas are presented in a somewhat repetitive manner, focusing primarily on economic costs. To improve, you should explore the counter-arguments more deeply and provide more balanced, sophisticated reasoning to support your position, rather than relying on stereotypical views of aging.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, which helps the reader follow the structure. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and repetitive. For instance, the transition 'In addition to that' and 'Moreover' are used to link sentences, but the flow between ideas within paragraphs is sometimes disjointed. The referencing is occasionally unclear, such as in the phrase 'their medical is free', where the pronoun 'their' lacks a specific preceding noun phrase to anchor it effectively. Improving the variety of linking words and ensuring that each paragraph has a clear, singular focus would enhance the logical progression of your argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'create more troubles' and 'add their value'. There are also some awkward collocations and word choices, such as 'their medical is free' (should be 'medical care') and 'local bodies' (which is vague in this context). To reach a higher band, you should aim to use more academic collocations and precise terminology related to demographics and economics, such as 'pension schemes', 'healthcare expenditure', or 'intergenerational support'.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the flow. Common issues include missing articles ('the government', 'the society'), incorrect pluralization ('elder people' instead of 'elderly people'), and awkward phrasing like 'they can avail free transport facility'. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors prevents the writing from reaching a higher band. You should focus on subject-verb agreement and the correct use of articles, as well as ensuring that complex sentences are constructed with greater accuracy.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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