Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-01

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In many countries, human beings are living more than early. Some of humans think that older people creates trouble for governments. While, rest of them think that aged people are beneficial for society. I think that there are more pros than cons. Reasons and examples are mentioned in upcoming paragraph.

Globally population is becoming major problem for many countries. In which 35-40% humans are aged, due to this some people thinks older people are not not contributing for their country and become burden to their family and nation because older people are suffering from illness and wealth issues. Therefor, their government face shortage in skilled workers. For instance, In Japan people's average life is 75 years which is why more than 70% people's age is above 70. In addition, this the reason why Japan immigrates skilled workers from all over the world. Same problems occurs with European countries like Switzerland, Austria, Finland, etc.

On the other hand, people think that having older people in their family beneficial for them. People thinks that older people helps them in important life decision also helps

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 4.0

The response fails to meet the minimum word count requirement of 250 words, reaching only 182 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas. While you state a position in the introduction, the second paragraph is underdeveloped, and the third paragraph is incomplete, ending abruptly. The task requires a balanced discussion of both sides and a clear conclusion, which is missing here. Because the response is incomplete and under-length, it cannot fully address all parts of the prompt.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay lacks a clear logical progression due to its unfinished state. While you attempt to use transition words like 'Therefore' and 'In addition', the flow is disrupted by the abrupt ending of the final paragraph. Paragraphing is present, but the lack of a concluding summary makes the overall structure feel disjointed. Referencing is sometimes unclear, such as in the phrase 'In which 35-40% humans are aged', where the antecedent is ambiguous.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and repetitive. You rely on basic phrasing such as 'human beings', 'older people', and 'major problem'. There are also issues with word choice and collocation, such as 'wealth issues' (likely meaning 'health issues') and 'immigrates skilled workers' (the correct term is 'imports' or 'recruits'). The range is insufficient to express complex ideas about demographic shifts effectively.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('older people creates', 'some people thinks'), missing articles ('In Japan people's average life'), and awkward sentence construction ('Globally population is becoming major problem'). While you attempt some complex structures, they are often marred by errors that occasionally impede the reader's understanding. A wider range of error-free complex sentences is needed for a higher band.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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