Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In many countries, people are now living longer than before. An aging population has both advantages and disadvantages. To some extent, the advantages of having an aging population is beneficial than the disadvantages.
The primary reason that society thinks elderly people are a burden is that, they can't take care of themselves. Often they require some kind of helps from either their children or the society. The situation becomes worse in the middle and lower income families. Due to their age, they simply couldn't contribute to the monthly earning. Also in some countries, the birth rate drops rapidly as young people are too busy with their work life.
Apart from these disadvantages, there are some positive sides too. Elderly people have their vast knowledge of the life itself and the history of the country. They can guide the young generations to take more smart decisions. In addition, some of them were experts of their relative working field in the past. Even though they can't operate like before, they can surely teach these valuable skills to the young people.
From my view, Japan is the prime example of this particular scenario. The average life expectancy is over 80 years. Many old people still work at various work places apart from their age. With proper mindset and intention, it is possible to live alongside the elderly people without any problem.
From taking everything into account, elderly people does create some problems for the governments. Although it has certain benefits that outweigh the disadvantages.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing both sides of the argument and a clear personal position. However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited. For instance, the point about elderly people being a 'burden' is mentioned, but the economic implications could be explored with more depth. Similarly, the benefits are discussed in general terms. While the position is clear, the supporting arguments lack specific evidence or detailed elaboration, which prevents the essay from reaching a higher band. The conclusion is present but slightly repetitive in its phrasing.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0
The essay is logically organized into paragraphs, each with a clear focus. There is a progression of ideas from the introduction to the body paragraphs and the conclusion. Cohesive devices are used, such as 'Apart from these', 'In addition', and 'From my view', though some transitions feel a bit mechanical. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate the different aspects of the topic. While the flow is generally smooth, the connection between sentences could be more sophisticated to improve the overall coherence of the argument.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task, allowing the student to convey their meaning clearly. There are some attempts to use less common vocabulary, such as 'life expectancy' and 'prime example'. However, there are instances of imprecise word choice, such as 'take more smart decisions' (should be 'make smarter decisions') and 'relative working field' (should be 'respective field'). The range is sufficient to discuss the topic, but it lacks the precision and flexibility required for a higher band score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The student uses a mix of simple and complex sentence structures. There are several grammatical errors throughout the text, such as subject-verb agreement issues ('elderly people does create', 'advantages... is beneficial') and awkward phrasing ('requires some kind of helps'). While these errors do not impede communication, they occur frequently enough to impact the overall accuracy. To improve, the student should focus on subject-verb agreement and refining the use of articles and pluralization to ensure more error-free sentences.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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