Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-06
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Now a days, people are living longer in many countries. An aging people has some benefits. I believed that the older people have more disadvantages for governments.
On the one hand, the older people are blessing for society and their families. The aging people gave valuable knowledge and professional life experiences to young generation. They also take care as a grandparent. Especially retired grandparents may also look after their grandchildren and allow parents for continuing works. The advice of aging people is just like magic for protecting any danger, wrong decision and risk in life, but the condition is that if young generation follow them properly.
On the other hand, the financial issue is more significant.AS, the people grew up they generally required more health care and also medical treatments. Over the period, the government has must gave their pensions for a lifetime while, the government charge taxes from youth. That's why some of these reasons may highly effect on education and financial issue for youth.
In conclusion, the elderly people support their families in various ways and gave life experience but i believed that the highly costs and their pensions mean that the aging people outweigh the disadvantages.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response fails to meet the minimum length requirement of 250 words, reaching only 199 words. This significantly impacts the development of ideas, as the arguments remain superficial and lack sufficient supporting evidence or examples. While you address both sides of the argument and provide a clear position, the under-length nature of the essay means the task is only partially addressed. To improve, you must expand on your points—for example, by explaining the specific economic mechanisms through which an aging population impacts tax revenue or by providing more detailed real-world examples of how elderly individuals contribute to society.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into logical paragraphs, with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is somewhat mechanical and occasionally inaccurate, such as the awkward transition 'AS, the people grew up'. While the progression of ideas is generally clear, the lack of depth makes the overall flow feel somewhat disjointed. To achieve a higher band, focus on using a wider variety of linking words and phrases (e.g., 'consequently', 'furthermore', 'in contrast') to connect sentences and ideas more fluidly.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is generally adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There is some repetition of basic terms like 'people' and 'aging'. You attempt some topic-specific vocabulary, such as 'professional life experiences' and 'financial issue', but there are errors in collocation and word choice, such as 'aging people' (should be 'the elderly' or 'an aging population') and 'gave valuable knowledge' (should be 'provide' or 'impart'). Expanding your vocabulary to include more academic collocations would improve your score.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede clarity. Examples include 'An aging people has' (subject-verb agreement), 'the government has must gave' (incorrect modal/verb form), and 'highly effect on' (confusion between noun/verb). Punctuation is also inconsistent. To improve, focus on mastering basic subject-verb agreement and the correct use of modal verbs. Increasing the variety of complex sentence structures while ensuring accuracy will help you move toward a higher band.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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