Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-08
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
Life expectancy has been improving day by day. In certain nations, individuals are now living longer in comparison of earlier. Few individuals think that aging population can creates issue, while other believe that having more senior citizen can be beneficial for the community. In my opinion, the benefits of this trend are much bigger than the drawbacks because of their wisdom and guidance and community support.
On the one hand, I believe that through shared the valuable knowledge and guidance of adults, we can overcome from any circumstances, while there experience can help as a roadmap in difficult phase of life. and they can work as a volunteer by join with community help, which will give them platform to spent time with children's in schools, child care center and enjoy with them by playing games and teach good morals.
On the other hand, the main problem is that healthcare strain . Many older people faces health issue with time such as heart chronic disease, disability , which can overwhelm medical health infrastructure of a country and lead to emergency. Another issue could be labor shortage. As many country is facing experienced worker shortage due to this there economy get in shrink. For example, according to some news reports Japan will going to face skilled worker shortage in future because their more than half citizens are getting older , which can slow there national economic growth.
In conclusion, despite a few small negative points, I think the advantages of having senior citizens are much stronger because they provide experience and knowledge.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.5 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the prompt, providing a clear position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The ideas are relevant, such as the value of wisdom and the strain on healthcare, but they are somewhat under-developed. For instance, the discussion on 'community support' is quite brief and lacks specific examples of how this functions in practice. While the position is maintained throughout, the supporting arguments could be extended with more depth to reach a higher band. The conclusion is a bit simplistic and merely restates the introduction rather than synthesizing the main points effectively.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.5
The essay is organized into clear paragraphs, and there is a logical progression of ideas from the introduction to the body paragraphs and conclusion. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or slightly awkward, such as 'overcome from any circumstances' or 'due to this there economy get in shrink'. Referencing is occasionally unclear, and the flow between sentences could be smoother. While the paragraphing is appropriate, the internal cohesion within paragraphs needs more variety and precision to achieve a higher score.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.5
The vocabulary is adequate for the task but lacks the precision and range required for higher bands. There are several instances of awkward collocations and word choice errors, such as 'living longer in comparison of earlier' instead of 'compared to the past' and 'medical health infrastructure' instead of 'healthcare system'. Some phrasing is repetitive, and the attempt to use more sophisticated vocabulary occasionally leads to inaccuracies. To improve, focus on learning natural collocations and using more precise academic terminology.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.5
The essay contains a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but there are frequent grammatical errors that occasionally impede the reader's flow. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues ('Many older people faces', 'As many country is facing'), incorrect preposition usage ('overcome from'), and punctuation errors. While the meaning is generally clear, the frequency of these errors is noticeable. To improve, focus on basic subject-verb agreement, correct article usage, and ensuring that complex sentence structures are grammatically sound.
See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.
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