Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-13
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In many countries, individual are now living longer than ever befor. Although some individual argue that an aging population creates issues for authorities, other people opine there are benefits if community has more elderly people, Despite the considerable benefits associated with longer life of an aging population, there are also several potential drawbacks that need to be taken into consideration.
On the one hand, a primary advantage of having aging population is that they spread culture and helps to childcare. An aging population have extra knowledge about our history, they know how to care our child and how to maintain our culture in this generation. As a result, a geriatric individuals helps to build nation financial strong because they have enough experience about political system. Furthermore, the another benefit of aging population is that managing sytem. from local to state aging population helps to maintain system. for example, In every homes aging population carry all responsibility of home which facilitates to stay unity not alone.
On the other hand, There are several drawbacks having more aging population in nations, First of cell, Depending on government, In many countries, government provides good service for geriatric individuals which create finicial issues in nation. For instance, If the nation have enough aging population this country is unable to development rapidly because
In many Countries, Individuals are now living longer than ever befor. Although some individual argue to an aging population creates issues for authorities, older people opine there are benefits if community has more elderly people, Despite the considerable benefits associated with longer life of an aging population, there are also several potential drawbacks that need to be taken into consideration.
On the one hand, a primary advantage of having aging population is that they spread a culture and helps to childcare. An aging population have extra knowledge about our history, they know how to care our child and how to maintain our culture in this generation. As a result, a Geriatric individuals helps to build nation financial strong because they have enough experience about political system. Furthermore, the another benefit of aging population is that managing sytem from local to state aging population helps to maintain system, For example, In every homes aging population carry all responsibility of home which faciliates to stay Unity not alone.
On the other hand, There are several drawbacks having more aging population in nations, First of all, Depending on government, In many countries, government provides good service for geriatric individuals which create financial issues In nation. For instance, If the nation have enough aging population this country is unable to development rapidly. because
more of the money invest for aging population, furthermore, the another drawbacks of having an aging population on nations is that country depend on other countries. If the population of aging individuals is high, the younger and strong individual is low which create a massive issues of dependent like productive loss, expertise acquire from another country etc. As a result, its directly effect on growth growth on nations.
In conclusion, having an aging population provide several benefit. However, also impact on nation growth.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0
The response addresses both the advantages and disadvantages of an aging population, expressing an overall view. However, the development of ideas is limited and repetitive, largely due to the inclusion of an almost identical duplicated paragraph (the student accidentally repeated large portions of the text). The arguments regarding cultural preservation and childcare are relevant but under-developed, while the points concerning government financial strain and productivity loss lack specific, well-reasoned support. Ideas tend to be generalized and sometimes unclear, such as the claim about political systems and financial strength. Overall, the response meets the basic requirements of addressing the prompt, but the repetition and thin elaboration place it firmly in Band 5.0.
Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0
The text is organized into paragraphs, including an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, the presence of a largely duplicated second introduction and body section severely disrupts the logical flow and progression of the essay. Cohesive devices are used repetitively or inaccurately (e.g., 'First of cell', 'Furthermore, the another benefit'), and referencing is frequently unclear, leaving the reader confused about pronoun antecedents like 'they' and 'it'. Paragraphing is attempted, but the internal cohesion of arguments breaks down due to sentence fragments and run-on structures. These issues warrant a Band 5.0 for coherence and cohesion.
Lexical Resource — Band 5.0
The student demonstrates a limited, minimally adequate range of vocabulary for this task. While there are attempts to use less common items such as 'geriatric individuals', 'political system', and 'productivity loss', these are often marred by word choice errors, awkward collocations, and spelling mistakes (e.g., 'befor', 'sytem', 'faciliates', 'finicial'). Repetition of basic words like 'aging population', 'countries', and 'government' is noticeable throughout the response. Although communication is generally maintained despite errors, the frequent lexical inaccuracies and restricted range reflect Band 5.0 descriptors.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0
The essay displays a very limited range of grammatical structures, with frequent errors in complex sentences. There are multiple sentence fragments (e.g., 'For instance, If the nation have enough aging population this country is unable to development rapidly because...' and ending sentences abruptly with 'because'). Subject-verb agreement errors are common, such as 'an aging population is that they spread' and 'a geriatric individuals helps'. Punctuation is also problematic, with comma splices and incorrect capitalization. These persistent, frequent errors cause difficulty for the reader and align with the Band 5.0 descriptors for grammatical range and accuracy.
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