Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Aging population has become increasingly prevalent in recent years. While this trend offers several benefits, it also brings certain drawbacks. This essay will explore both the advantanges and disadvantages before reaching a conclusion.

I strongly feel that an aging population is producing more problems for governments. There are several reasons for that but I will focus majorly on two. In addition I will also share my experience as well.

The first reason is activeness. As we all know that the younger ones are more energetic and active than the older people. Young people can do the same activities in minimum time which the older one will do in maximum time. Young generation is very fit as compare to senior citizens, so they can contribute better in most of the activities.

Secondly, adolescents are more innovative than the older people. They have the

sharpest minds .Furthermore

they can match with requirements

of the modern era. For instance, my

cousin has developed a machine which

can read the minds of the population

Although there are many senior ones

present in his company.However,

he and his collegues developed this

mind blowing device.

Although there are some disadvantages

of younger population as well . It will discuss

the two major ones. The first one is the

experience. The older people have much

more experience than youth. Secondly

the younger minds have more stress

as compare to older ones which impacts

their performance as well.

In conclusion, while aging population

offers notable benefits such as experience

, it also presents challenges including fatigue, less innovation etc. On balance, I believe

the disadvantages / advantages of aging population outweigh the advantages/disadvantages

of younger population.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses the prompt regarding an aging population, attempting to weigh advantages and disadvantages. However, the development of ideas is limited and confused in places. For instance, the writer frequently slips into comparing the younger generation with older people rather than solely discussing the societal impacts of an aging population. The position becomes muddled toward the end, where the conclusion contains contradictory phrasing such as 'disadvantages / advantages of aging population outweigh the advantages/disadvantages of younger population.' While all parts of the prompt are touched upon, the arguments are overly simplistic, rely heavily on sweeping generalisations, and lack robust support. Therefore, these limitations place the performance at Band 5.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 5.0

The essay displays some basic organisation, dividing points into paragraphs, but the overall progression lacks clarity and logical flow. Paragraphing is highly fragmented and erratic, with several very short, broken paragraphs, such as 'Furthermore they can match with requirements of the modern era.' Cohesive devices are used awkwardly or inaccurately, and referencing is sometimes confusing (e.g., abrupt shifts between discussing elderly people, adolescents, and personal anecdotes). There is also noticeable repetition in how ideas are linked. While the reader can generally follow the overarching topic, the structural inconsistencies and mechanical cohesion constrain the score to Band 5.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.0

The vocabulary is limited and repetitious, relying heavily on basic terms such as 'older people', 'younger people', 'problems', and 'benefits'. There are noticeable word-choice and collocation errors, such as 'activeness' instead of 'activity' or 'energy', 'senior ones' instead of 'senior citizens', and 'as compare to' instead of 'compared to'. Attempts to use more advanced vocabulary result in unnatural phrasing, like 'mind blowing device'. Spelling and word formation are generally adequate, but the restricted lexical range and frequent lexical inaccuracies mean the response firmly meets the criteria for Band 5.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 5.0

The essay uses a mix of simple and attempted complex sentence forms, but control is weak. There are frequent grammatical errors throughout the text, including missing articles ('As we all know that the younger ones'), incorrect prepositions ('in minimum time'), and faulty comparative structures ('as compare to'). Punctuation and sentence boundary errors also occur frequently, such as broken sentences and run-on phrasing ('For instance, my cousin has developed a machine... Although there are many senior ones present in his company. However, he and his collegues...'). These recurring errors cause some difficulty for the reader and reflect Band 5.0 grammatical control.

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