Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-18

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

Now a days the elder peoples are liveing longer and there is a growing population for the goverment and others things older people can bring the benefits to the society for aging the population there is both the advantages and the disadvantages for the elder peoples

The disadvantages of the elder people first of all there nedd a medical treatment for the elder people to live there are many problems in the hospitals for to serve the elder people when the age is about the 80 to 90 they dont listen the words of us they do they need that is the major pronlems for the ellder people in thecountry if one thong we acan tell they dont listen our word that is the main problem occour the elder people they do not listen clerly and eyes not visuble correctly that is the main problem for the elder people in the country this is the disadvantage of the elder people

The adavantage of the elder people is about the they know many ides about the work and there is a lot of energy to do work when compared to the present generation the people can not do the work of 4 to 5 hours in the olden days the people work whole day under the sunlight with out takeing the rest that the capacity of thr olden peoples compared to the presnt generation in olden days they can eat only rotis that have many energy to do work that why they can live more days in the earth

in the conclusion population can create a challenges especially because of the health care costs and the pressure on the working population

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 5.0

The response addresses both parts of the prompt regarding the problems and benefits of an aging population, attempting to weigh them. A position is discernible, though the development of ideas is limited and somewhat repetitive. For instance, the discussion on disadvantages focuses heavily and somewhat incoherently on personal medical and behavioral complaints rather than broader governmental challenges, although it touches briefly on healthcare costs in the conclusion. The advantages section mentions experience and work capacity in the past compared to the present, but arguments remain under-developed and lack specific examples. While the student attempts to fulfill the task requirements, the lack of depth and clarity in supporting arguments places this performance firmly at Band 5.0.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 4.0

The essay displays basic paragraphing with an introduction, separate body paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. However, overall progression is weak and ideas are often disjointed. Cohesive devices are either missing or misused, resulting in run-on sentences and a lack of logical flow. For example, sentences like 'Now a days the elder peoples are liveing longer and there is a growing population...' string multiple clauses together without appropriate punctuation or conjunctions. Referencing is frequently unclear, making it difficult to follow the progression of thought. Consequently, the organization reflects the descriptors for Band 4.0, as information and ideas are not arranged in a sufficiently coherent manner.

Lexical Resource — Band 4.0

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, frequently relying on simple terms such as 'elder peoples', 'good', and 'work'. There are numerous spelling and word-formation errors throughout the text, including 'liveing', 'nedd', 'pronlems', 'adavantage', 'ides', 'with out', 'takeing', and 'presnt'. Attempts to use less common vocabulary are generally inaccurate, and spelling errors cause some strain for the reader. The range of vocabulary is minimally adequate for conveying very basic points, aligning closely with the Band 4.0 descriptors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 4.0

The grammatical range is extremely limited, consisting mostly of poorly controlled simple and complex sentence structures. There is a near-total absence of correct punctuation, leading to long, run-on sentences that make comprehension very difficult (e.g., 'when the age is about the 80 to 90 they dont listen the words of us they do they need that is the major pronlems...'). Errors in tense, subject-verb agreement, and clause structure are pervasive throughout the response. Because errors are extremely frequent and frequently distort meaning, the writing meets the criteria for Band 4.0.

See this exact question answered at other band scores — the same prompt compared across bands.

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