Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some people think aging population creates problems for governments due to several reasons. Firstly, most of them are retired from work and become a liability to their families and the government. They invest less than what they demand. Secondly, they might become ill and a burden to the finances and healthcare systems. The medicine costs and medical test expenditures of old people remain significantly high.

While other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. Firstly, there are wise people among ourselves to share their wisdom. Their wisdom can act as asset to the next generation. Secondly. young people can go to offices, leaving their children with their grandparents.This sets the couple free to work without worrying about their kids. Thirdly, they live on their retirement fund and might benefit others in hard times.

In my opinion, there are more advantages than disadvantages of having elderly people. They become useful when they are taught skills for example baby sitting or stitching by elderly woman and driving by old man. They can be trained to other activities too and they might become great teachers sharing their life lessons to youth.

My grandmother used to take care of her grandchildren until she died while the parents of those children went for work. My grandfather used to pick up the children from school when the parents were busy. Moreover, my grandfather still gets the retirement salary called pension, which is not only enough for his own sustainence but he also provides for his family.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the problems and benefits of an aging population and providing a clear personal position. Ideas are presented, such as the economic burden of healthcare and the invaluable childcare and wisdom provided by grandparents, supported by personal experience. However, the development of ideas tends to be somewhat superficial and lacks extension in places. For instance, the point about retirement funds and hard times is very brief. The supporting example about the author's grandparents adds personal relevance, but overall, the task response sits comfortably at Band 6.0 due to the limited depth of idea extension and slight over-generalisation.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear stance presented in the introduction and reinforced in the conclusion. Paragraphing is attempted, though some paragraphs are quite short and fragmented, particularly the final two body sections which might be better integrated. Cohesive devices are used to signal progression, such as 'Firstly', 'Secondly', and 'Moreover', but referencing is occasionally repetitive or mechanical. For example, starting multiple consecutive sentences with 'Secondly' or 'They' creates a somewhat simplistic transitional flow. Overall, the logical progression is evident, meeting the requirements for a Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'liability', 'healthcare systems', 'retirement fund', and 'sustenance'. However, there are noticeable limitations and inaccuracies in word choice and collocation. Phrases like 'invest less than what they demand' and 'old man' are unnatural or imprecise. Furthermore, there are minor slips such as 'aging population' missing an article in the opening sentence and 'baby sitting' or 'stitching by elderly woman'. While communication is not impeded and the vocabulary is sufficient to convey the intended meaning, these inaccuracies restrict the score to a Band 5.5 or 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing relative clauses and conditional structures. There are several grammatical errors and punctuation lapses throughout the text, such as missing articles ('aging population'), incorrect singular/plural agreement ('old man' instead of 'old men', 'elderly woman' instead of 'elderly women'), and minor prepositional misuse ('trained to other activities' instead of 'trained in'). Punctuation errors also appear, including a missing space after a full stop ('Secondly. young people'). Despite these frequent minor errors, they rarely impede communication, as the core meaning remains clear. This reflects the characteristics of a Band 6.0 performance.

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