Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-22

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

Nowadays, individuals have a longer life span as compared to the past in a significant number of nations. While some people argue that elderly population causes more difficulties for local authorities, others believe that it has positive impacts on society to have older people. Although it creates pension and tax pressures to the government, I believe its advantages outweigh disadvantages as better mentorship to the young population and family support.

On the one hand, there are several reasons why aged people are beneficial for the society. The prominent reason is that they provide adequate knowledge and mentorship to the young population. In other words, elderly people have extensive work experience so they guide youngsters to become more productive and advanced. They have not only work experience but also firsthand knowledge about historical events. For instance, according to the Economic Times, if senior citizens share their experiences with the new generation, this makes their future decision more ideal and this helps them to become mature and knowledgable. Moreover, elderly population also provides family support to their children as they often help care for grandchildren and assist with household chores, while their child focus on their future career.

On the other hand, despite having advantages there are many disadvantages of the elderly population as well. The first and foremost drawback of this is that it may pressurizes the government to provide good healthcare and pensions to older individuals. To explain it, the local authorities have to spend country's expense on elderly people to give them retired pension and develop advanced infrastructure and hospitals for their healthcare. However, this expense would be used on public welfare and defence of the country.

In conclusion, although the government should provide pensions and healthcare facilities which create a burden on national expenses; yet elderly population gives proper knowledge and mentorship to youngsters to achieve virtue future goal and they also deliver family support.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response — Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task, presenting a clear position that the advantages of an aging population outweigh the disadvantages. In the introduction, the writer outlines the main points: mentorship for the young and family support versus financial pressures. The body paragraphs successfully develop these ideas. For instance, the discussion on mentorship includes an example attributed to the Economic Times, and the point regarding family support is clearly explained. The disadvantages are also covered by addressing healthcare and pension costs. However, the conclusion has a slightly awkward phrasing ('virtue future goal'), and some ideas could be extended further for a higher band. Overall, the task is well addressed, earning a solid Band 7.0 according to the descriptors.

Coherence and Cohesion — Band 6.5

The essay is logically organized and demonstrates a clear progression throughout. Each paragraph has a distinct focus: introduction, advantages (mentorship and family support), disadvantages (economic burden), and conclusion. Cohesive devices such as 'On the one hand', 'On the other hand', 'In other words', and 'In conclusion' are used to guide the reader, although some referencing is a bit mechanical or repetitive. Paragraphing is used appropriately and sufficiently to structure the argument. While the organizational framework is clear and logical, minor flaws in transitions and referencing prevent the response from reaching Band 8, placing it firmly at Band 7.0.

Lexical Resource — Band 6.0

The student uses a sufficient range of vocabulary to allow some flexibility and precision, attempting less common lexical items such as 'prominent reason', 'firsthand knowledge', and 'infrastructure'. However, there are noticeable word choice and collocation inaccuracies throughout the text. For example, the phrase 'pressurizes the government' should be 'puts pressure on the government' or 'pressures the government', and 'virtue future goal' is awkward and inaccurate. Spelling is generally good, but minor vocabulary slips occur. Because the vocabulary range is adequate and attempts less common items despite occasional inaccuracies, a Band 6.0 is awarded.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy — Band 6.0

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at varied grammatical structures (e.g., conditional-like clauses and relative clauses). There are, however, several grammatical errors throughout the response. Examples include 'elderly population causes' (missing an article: 'the elderly population'), 'pressures to the government' (preposition error: 'pressures on the government'), 'while their child focus' (subject-verb agreement error: 'children focus'), and 'country's expense' (article and pluralization issues). These errors do not impede communication, but they occur with enough frequency to prevent the score from reaching Band 7. Therefore, a Band 6.0 is appropriate.

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