Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people believes that, an aging population creates problems for governments while other people have opinion that, having elderly people will benefits the society more.

In my opinion, balanced community have almost less or equal proportion of aging numbers as youth. no doubt old people have more experience, patience, exposure and power of taking right decision at right time as compared to youth but they dont have enough energy and potential to practically apply these traits.

The Group of people who is in favor of aging population think that above mentioned skills and quality of aged may benefits society to keep its harmoney. For instance such as in family elder people always guide youth in taking correct decision. Their exposure and experience of tackling situations always safegaurd from big loss.In comaprison to other group which is not in favor of aging population says that they are burden on society just beacuse they dont have energy left to practically exercise thier characteristics and furthermore it need reasouces, time and energy of young people to take care of them. similarly this situation fits in refence to government. Goverenment have to give benefist in term of pensions and other facilities to aging population which has impact on econmy and infrastructure.

In the last, I would like to mention that its might be true that states are giving benefits to them but this benefits is in regard of their services which they had rendered for society, once they were young. So, it is completely fair to give them edge. futhermore we can additionally take benefits of their widen exposure when needed.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both the problems and benefits of an aging population, and the writer provides a personal viewpoint ("In my opinion, balanced community..."). However, the development of ideas is somewhat limited and lacks depth. For instance, the discussion on economic impact mentions that "Goverenment have to give benefist in term of pensions," but this point is not fully extended with specific examples or deep analysis. The conclusion attempts to balance the argument by highlighting older generations' past services, but overall, the reasoning tends to be generalised. This performance aligns well with Band 6 descriptors, as all parts of the task are addressed, but some ideas remain under-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The essay has a recognisable overall structure with an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion ("In the last..."). However, paragraphing is poorly managed; for instance, the second body paragraph is extremely dense, grouping together opposing views ("In comaprison to other group...") which creates confusion regarding logical progression. Cohesive devices are sometimes mechanical or misused, such as "similarly this situation fits in refence to government." Referencing is also occasionally unclear, particularly with pronoun use. These flaws place the response firmly in Band 5, as there is a lack of clear overall progression within paragraphs and cohesive devices are inadequate or inaccurate at times.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

The student attempts some less common vocabulary such as "harmoney," "exposure," and "infrastructure," but there are numerous spelling and word-choice errors throughout the text (e.g., "believes" instead of believe, "benefist," "econmy," "refence," "futhermore," and "widen" instead of wide or extensive). While the vocabulary used is adequate to convey the basic meaning of the arguments, these noticeable errors in spelling and collocation occasionally cause minor strain for the reader. This corresponds to a Band 5 lexical resource profile, showing a limited but minimally adequate range with persistent errors.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, but control over grammar and punctuation is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement (e.g., "Some people believes that," "The Group of people who is in favor"), missing articles ("in family elder people"), and incorrect verb forms ("it need reasouces"). Punctuation is also problematic, with missing capitalisation at the start of sentences ("no doubt old people...") and misplaced commas. Although simple sentences are generally understandable, the frequent errors in complex structures often cause difficulty for the reader, placing the grammar score at Band 5.

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