Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-25

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In today's rapidly changing world, there is a major shift seen in people's way of thinking. The ratio of the average age has significantly increased in multiple countries over the years. Because of this, some people tend to believe that elderly people may cause concerns for the the government, and on the other hand, some people believe that it is really beneficial for a community to have a larger number of elderly people. In this essay, I will discuss both advantages and disadvantages of this perspective. Personally, I am in favour of having an elderly population because I believe that it has many advantages over its disadvantages in terms of their experience and insights, which are lacking in young people, and also their love and affection that they can give to their close ones.

To begin with, having elderly people in a community has numerous benefits. For instance, a country can utilize the experience of these people in policy making for the betterment of their society, as well as their experienced insights might play a crucial role in every area of the community that needs to be improved.

Moreover, in many cultures, it feels like a blessing to have old people. For example, if a child has grandparents, it might be a plus factor as there are many things which he can learn from his grandparents, such as the right direction, the love, and affection that are really essential for his upbringing. The elder population is also useful for young people.

In contrast, this view has its disadvantages too. For instance, it may be quite problematic for a country to have an older population as the government has to pay attention to their health and economic issues because older people in many countries do nothing for themselves. With the passage of time, they become useless and are considered a liability for the government and even sometimes for their families too.

In conclusion, it is obvious that an older population can provide multiple benefits to a community. Although this view has some disadvantages, I suggest that the government should utilize the experience of these people and engage them in healthy activities.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The candidate addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of an aging population and clearly states a personal position in the introduction. The ideas are generally relevant, but the development is somewhat limited and repetitive. For example, the discussion on advantages focuses broadly on experience and affection without fully extending the arguments with concrete examples, while the mention of older people becoming 'useless' in the counter-argument is an over-generalisation. The conclusion reiterates the stance appropriately. Overall, the response meets the criteria for Band 6 as it addresses all parts of the task with relevant ideas, though some areas remain under-developed.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay has a coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. However, the use of cohesive devices is sometimes mechanical or repetitive, such as the frequent reliance on transitional phrases like 'To begin with', 'Moreover', and 'In contrast'. Referencing is generally clear, but the logical progression between sentences occasionally falters, particularly in the third paragraph where the link between the elder population and young people is abrupt. The response demonstrates the characteristics of Band 6 in terms of logical organization and cohesive usage.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common items such as 'policy making', 'upbringing', and 'liability'. However, there are noticeable inaccuracies in word choice, collocation, and phrasing, such as 'the ratio of the average age has significantly increased' and stating that older people 'do nothing for themselves' and 'become useless'. These awkward phrasings and occasional lexical errors reflect Band 6 performance, where the vocabulary is sufficient to communicate the main points but lacks the precision and natural control seen in higher bands.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer demonstrates a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing structures like conditional clauses ('if a child has grandparents...') and relative clauses. There are several grammatical errors and awkward constructions throughout the text, including a doubled article ('the the government') and structural clumsiness such as 'it feels like a blessing to have old people'. Despite these errors, meaning is rarely impeded, and basic structures are generally accurate. This balance of mixed sentence forms and occasional non-systematic errors places the grammatical performance firmly at Band 6.

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