Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In many countries, a growing number of people have more extended life span than previous. It is believed by some people that, an aging demographic is a burden for governments, while others thinks that elderly people are boon to the society. I largely think that the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages.

It could be argued that,having an aging population requires a lot of additional costs such as medical treatment, regular check-up, which could create considerable amount of pressure on the underpriviledged people. As elderly people are more vulnerable to different kinds of complex diseases, thus they need more medical attention and treatment. If they are given government subsidies and other financial support to be taken care of, I think they can be an asset for the holistic growth of a country.

However i would argue that, elderly people are blessings for many families. Because, elderly people are the only one's who could potentially preserve the culture, food and heritage of a family, which then could be passed to the next generation. In recent years, many people are reverting from cultures due to the less exposure and practices, having an elderly demographic significanly ensures the recognition and practice of these traditions.

A further reason of having an elderly people is that, they play a crucial role in taking care of children in families where both parents work outsides, which is significant for the congitive and language development of a child.

In conclusion, I largely think that the advnatanges such as cultural preservation and for the physical and mental well-being of a child dwarf the minor inconvinences one might face. Therefore, it is highly imporatant that we value our elder demographic for overall development of a society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the prompt by discussing both the problems and benefits of an aging population and clearly states a position in the introduction and conclusion. The ideas are generally relevant and extended, such as the discussion on cultural preservation and childcare support. However, some arguments lack deeper elaboration. For instance, the point regarding medical costs and subsidies is slightly disjointed and under-developed. Nevertheless, a clear position is maintained throughout, satisfying the requirements for Band 6.5 to 7.0. Given the solid coverage of the prompt and clear stance, a score of 6.5 is appropriate.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with logical paragraphing, with each paragraph focusing on a distinct idea (costs, cultural benefits, childcare). Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'It could be argued that', 'However', and 'In conclusion'. However, there are some minor mechanical and slightly unnatural transitions, such as 'A further reason of having an elderly people', and referencing is occasionally clunky (e.g., repeating 'elderly people' frequently rather than using pronouns effectively). Progression is generally clear throughout, earning a solid Band 6.5.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common items such as 'demographic', 'subsidies', 'holistic growth', and 'cognitive'. However, there are noticeable lexical errors, awkward collocations, and spelling mistakes throughout the text, including 'life span than previous' instead of 'previously', 'boon to the society' missing an article, 'underpriviledged' (spelling), 'outsides', and 'advnatanges' and 'inconvinences' (typos). While these errors do not impede communication, they restrict the lexical score to a Band 6.0.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence structures with varying degrees of success. There are several grammatical errors and awkward structures present, such as 'a growing number of people have more extended life span than previous', 'Some people say... Other people think... I largely think...', and 'A further reason of having an elderly people is that...'. Punctuation errors, such as missing commas or unnecessary ones before clauses, also occur frequently. Because the errors are noticeable and occasionally cause slight hesitation for the reader without completely obscuring meaning, a score of 6.0 is well-justified.

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