Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
LAST CENTURY WITNESSED SIGNIFICANTLY INCREASED POPULATION OF OLDER PEOPLE. IN MANY COUNTRIES ESPECIALLY, IN DEVELOPED NATIONS, INDIVIDUALS ARE LIVING LONGER THAN AVERAGE LIFE OF HUMANS COMPARE TO PREVIOUS DECADES. SOME PEOLE ARGUE THAT AGING POPULATION IN THE SOCIETY CREATES ISSUES FOR GOVERNMENTS AND ADMMINISTRATORS. WHILE OTHER PEOPLE BELIEVE THAT THERE ARE SIGNIFICANT MERITS IF COMMUNITY HAS MORE OLDER PEOPLE. WHILE THIS TREND HAS BOTH BENEFITS AND DRAWBACKS, I BELIEVE THAT THE ADVANTAGES OUTWEIGTH THE DEMERIT.
THE PRIMARY ADVANTAGE OF THE DEVELOPMENT IS THAT ELDER PEOPLE HAVE MORE PROBLEM SOLVING AND UNDERSTANDING ABOUT PERTICULAR PROBLEMS. THIS IS BECAUSE OLDER PEOPLE HAVE MORE EXPERIENCE AND OLD PEOPLE SERVE AS STRONG PILLAR OF SOCIETY, CONTRIBUTING TO THE DEVELOPMENT OF A BETTER AND PROGRESSIVE SOCIETY. TO BE MORE SPECIFIC, ELDER INDIVIDUALS WORK EXPERIENCE AND PRODUCTIVE MIND MAY HELPFUL FOR YOUNGER GENERATION, AS WELL AS THEIR LANGUAGE AND SOCIAL SKILLS SUCH AS INTERPERSONAL OPINION, COMMUNICATION HELP FOR BETTER FUTURE OPPORTUNITIES FOR ADULTS. ADDITIONALLY, OLD AGE PARENT HELPS FOR TEACH MORAL VALUES FOR CHILDREN ALSO SHARE HISTORICAL EVENTS AND STORIES, THESE PHENOMENON ENCOURAGE THE CHILDREN INTREST IN HISTORY AND OTHER CORE SUBJECTS SUCH AS ART AND MUSIC. TO EXEMPLIFY, GRAND-PARENTS AND ELDER PEOPLE PLAY VITAL ROLE IN INDIAN SOCIETY. PEOPLE CAN LEARN MANY SKILLS AND FINDS THE PRODUCTIVE OPPORTUNITY FOR THEMSELVES AS WELL AS OLDE AGE INDIVIDUALS GIVE RIGHT COMPLEMENTARY AND ADVICE DURING THE CRUCIAL TIME. THEREFORE, THIS DEVELOPMENT CAN BE CONSIDERED LARGELY BENEFICIAL.
DESPITE THESE BENEFITS, THERE ARE SOME DISADVANTAGES. FIRSTLY, OLDER PEOPLE NOT ABLE TO DO WORK COMPARE TO YOUNGER ADULTS. MOREOVER, ELDER POPULATION MORE DEPENDENT ON MEDICINES AND OTHER MEDICAL FACILITIES. AS A RESULT, THIS CREATE A SIFNIFICANT FINANCIAL BURDEN FOR BOTH GOVERNMENT AND THEMSELVES. SECONDLY, GOVERMENT SHOULD SPEND LARGE AMOUNT OF BUDGENT ON CREATE INFRASTRUCTRE FOR OLDER POPULATION AND RETIRMENT POLICIES AND PANSION SCEAMS.
IN CONCLUSION, ALTHOUGH THERE ARE SOME FINANCIAL AND CORPORATE DRAWBACKS, IN MY PRERSPECTIVE, OLDER PEOPLE ARE OVERALL BENEFICIAL FOR SOCIETY.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of an aging population and clearly states a position in the introduction that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Ideas are presented, such as the wisdom and mentorship provided by older individuals compared against financial and healthcare burdens on governments. However, the development of these ideas tends to be repetitive and sometimes lacks clarity, such as the vague explanation of language and social skills. Examples are given, such as mentioning Indian society, but they are not fully elaborated. This performance aligns well with Band 6, where the task is addressed, but some ideas remain under-developed or general.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The essay is divided into an introduction, body paragraphs addressing advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. There is a coherent overall arrangement. However, referencing and cohesive devices are frequently faulty or mechanical. For instance, transitional phrases like 'TO BE MORE SPECIFIC' and 'SECONDLY' are used, but sentences within paragraphs often feel disjointed and lack smooth logical links. Paragraphing is present, but internal cohesion needs strengthening. The overuse of capitalization in the original text further impacts the visual flow. This corresponds to a Band 6 descriptor where the response is coherent overall, but cohesion can be mechanical and referencing unclear.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student attempts a range of vocabulary appropriate for the topic, including terms like 'administrators', 'interpersonal', 'financial burden', and 'infrastructure'. However, there are numerous lexical and spelling errors throughout the text, such as 'OUTWEIGTH', 'DEMERIT' (used instead of demerits or disadvantages), 'PERTICULAR', 'HEPFUL', 'INTREST', 'FINDS', 'COMPLEMENTARY', 'BUDGENT', 'PANSION', and 'SCEAMS'. While the meaning is generally clear despite these errors, the high frequency of lexical slips and incorrect word forms prevents the score from reaching a Band 6, placing it firmly at Band 5 where noticeable errors cause some difficulty for the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, utilizing conditional or concessive structures like 'WHILE THIS TREND HAS BOTH BENEFITS AND DRAWBACKS, I BELIEVE...'. However, grammatical accuracy is weak. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement, articles, and prepositions, such as 'older people not able to do work', 'elder population more dependent', 'older age parent helps for teach moral values', and 'government should spend large amount of budget on create'. These frequent grammatical errors sometimes impede smooth reading, though communication is generally maintained. This matches the Band 5 descriptor where a limited range of structures is used and frequent errors occur.
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