Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-27
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
In this modern globalized era, huge accomplishment have been made towards the prosperity of human beings. Now people are living longer than past due to advancement of technologies in health sectors. people have also been aware to take healthy diet with minimal costs.
First, I fully agree that aging population have numerous disadvantages on a country as a whole. If the number of aged people reaches maximum, it definately creates problem for governments. Government has to allocate huge portion of its budget for the betterment of old people. It can also hamper the development of country because significant amount of money is invested on them, in return they provide nothing and other sectors gets least funding which creates a slow pace of development especially buildings, bridges, advance technologies etc. For example: Japan remains the top country for elderly people, and also due to less birth rate, the government of Japan is facing workforce problems. To solve them, they are has encouraged immigration from other countries.
Secondly, some people argue that elderly people have potential advantages. Talking to it benefits, many people can take advice from elderly people regarding the livelihood, how to make life sucessful and mainly to deal with problems that they have faced. In addition, they can cope with elderly ones and can get their professionalism experience in which they did in past.
In conclusion, people can live their own in elderly life by the co-operation of their families rather than depending fully on government and it can be very helpful for concerned authorities to do focus on other development tasks.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the problems and benefits of an aging population, expressing a clear position that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. However, the development of ideas remains somewhat limited and generic. For instance, the discussion on the economic burden covers the national budget and infrastructure, but the example regarding Japan is only partially developed. Similarly, the second body paragraph attempting to explain the advantages focuses vaguely on receiving advice and livelihood tips from the elderly without elaborating on concrete societal benefits. While all parts of the task are addressed, the arguments would benefit from greater extension and specific supporting evidence to meet higher band descriptors. Therefore, a Band 6.0 is awarded.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay presents a coherent overall arrangement with a recognisable introduction, body paragraphs, and a brief conclusion. Paragraphing is attempted, though the transitions between ideas can feel abrupt and mechanical. For example, the writer uses basic signposts like 'First,' 'Secondly,' and 'In conclusion,' but the internal cohesion within paragraphs is sometimes faulty, such as the abrupt shift in focus within the second body paragraph starting with 'Talking to it benefits'. Referencing is occasionally unclear, as seen in 'they can cope with elderly ones and can get their professionalism experience'. Overall logical organisation is present, but cohesion requires more natural flow and accurate referencing for a higher score.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The vocabulary used is adequate to convey the writer's basic message, showing some attempts at less common items such as 'globalized era', 'prosperity', 'infrastructure', and 'immigration'. However, there are noticeable lexical inaccuracies, awkward word choices, and collocation errors throughout the text. Examples include 'huge accomplishment have been made', 'take healthy diet', 'aging population have numerous disadvantages', and 'professionalism experience'. Spelling is generally acceptable, but frequent word-formation errors and restricted precision place this performance securely in the Band 5.5 range.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The essay displays a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, attempting structures such as conditional and relative clauses. However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in subject-verb agreement ('huge accomplishment have', 'aging population have', 'other sectors gets'), article usage ('the development of country', 'in elderly life'), and prepositional phrases. Furthermore, some sentences are ungrammatical or structurally confusing, such as 'To solve them, they are has encouraged immigration' and 'Talking to it benefits'. These errors occasionally cause difficulty for the reader, aligning the response with the Band 5.0 descriptor.
See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.
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