Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-28
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.0)
Now a days, in many countries aging of the people has increased dramatically due to which many countires have alot of senior citizens.Due to this reason countries have many advantages and disatvantages.I believe that having more aging population has more benefits than disadvantages.Wisdom and helpers are one of the most important roles they play in modern society.
On of the main advantage of having aging people in society is experience of life they carry.Living a life of fifty to ninty years, they carried a wisdom from which younge people can take advantage of.While planning to do every important decision of there life they can take a precisious advice from elder one this can save people from many disasters.Either is there carrier and there marriages presence of the aging people matters alot as they can shape our life in better way.In modern world there is fraud and many crimes it is possible that one with less experience get trapped easily.
Recently I studied a case on social media where a twenty four year old girl visit a country without informing her parents and got stuck among human traffickers.While they asking for money on a call from her parents,they tell her that you are foolish and young you should take with us before going taking this decision .
Another benefit of having aging people around is there help.Many retire people now a days help to take care of there grandchildrens this is very helpful for the couples who work day and night for there successful future and there is some one trusted behind to take care of there childrens and home.
So in conclusion, I believe advantages of having senior citizens is more than disadvantages .we are save and we are free because of them .Thanks to them.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.0 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.0 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5
The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of an aging population and clearly stating a position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Ideas are introduced, such as the wisdom and help provided by senior citizens, and supported with an example regarding avoiding scams and assisting with grandchildren. However, some arguments remain somewhat limited and under-developed, relying on overly simplistic examples rather than broader sociological or economic impacts. The explanation regarding young people getting trapped by human traffickers is slightly tangential and anecdotal. Overall, the task response meets the criteria for Band 6.0 because it covers the prompt and takes a clear stance, but the development of ideas lacks sufficient breadth and depth for a higher band.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0
The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear attempt to structure the response into an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. However, paragraphing is somewhat erratic and lacks sufficient control; for instance, the single-sentence concluding thoughts are abrupt, and paragraph divisions do not always logically group distinct sub-topics. Cohesive devices are occasionally faulty or mechanical, with frequent missing conjunctions, pronoun referencing issues, and choppy sentence transitions (e.g., 'Due to this reason countries have many advantages and disatvantages' and 'So in conclusion, I believe advantages of having senior citizens is more than disadvantages'). These organizational flaws place the response firmly at Band 5.0, where cohesion is noticeably inadequate or mechanical.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.0
The student uses an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating terms such as 'senior citizens', 'modern society', 'experience of life', and 'human traffickers'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice errors throughout the text, including 'countires' for 'countries', 'disatvantages' for 'disadvantages', 'younge' for 'young', 'precisious' for 'precious', 'carrier' for 'career', 'retire' for 'retired', and 'grandchilds' for 'grandchildren'. These errors, alongside occasional awkward collocations, demonstrate a limited lexical range and place the writing at Band 5.0, as the inaccuracies can cause occasional difficulty for the reader.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
The response exhibits a very limited range of grammatical structures, relying predominantly on simple sentences and basic compound constructions. Attempts at complex sentences are frequently faulty, marred by missing articles, incorrect prepositions, and persistent subject-verb agreement errors (e.g., 'advantages of having senior citizens is more than disadvantages' and 'there is some one trusted behind'). Punctuation is also problematic, with missing spaces after commas and periods, and run-on sentences. Because frequent errors persist and simple structures dominate, the grammar aligns with Band 5.0 descriptors, where frequent errors cause some difficulty for the reader.
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