Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-28

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Recently, the average life span has increased in many countries. There are certain individuals who believe that having more elderly people can create issues for the governing bodies, while others state that communities can benefit if the number of aged persons is greater. From my perspective, the drawbacks of having more aging population outwieghs the benefits. In this essay, I will give reason in favor of my argument.

To commence with, one major disadvantage is that the old individuals contribute less in terms of economic growth and development. This is crucial because they don't go to jobs after a certain age, instead the government has to provide them pension, which leads to a financial burden. For instance, a government school teacher at the age of 50 gets retired, and receives pension without working. Now the government has to hire another teacher, and pay the retired and new staff as well.

Another unavoidable downside is greter health issues associated with old age. It can be attributedd to the fact that humans become more vulnerable and prone to disease as they get old. In other words, more healthcare cost linked with advancing age. For instance, the risk of infections increases with age, so more antibiotics will be needed. As the result, it will put a financial strain on both the youth and government.

Conversely, others state the having older people can be more advantageous for the society as a whole because the old people have more experience and skills than their young counterparts. In other words, the valuable knowledge of elders is an asset for the community, and they can solve professional and personal life problem more effectively and efficiently. To conclude, they have better advices and guidelines for the new generation.

Although the increase in aging population has some merits such as having better experience and skills, in my opinion, the drawbacks including: less contribution in economic growth and higher medical expenditures, are far more significant.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The student addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the disadvantages and the advantages of an aging population, and clearly states a position that the disadvantages outweigh the benefits in the introduction and conclusion. Ideas are extended with relevant examples, such as the discussion around retirement ages and increased healthcare and pension costs. However, some arguments tend to over-generalise slightly, and the example regarding a government school teacher retiring at 50 is a bit unrealistic in many modern contexts. Despite minor limitations in depth, the task is successfully fulfilled, earning a Band 6.5.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays a clear overall progression. Standard cohesive devices and transitional phrases are utilised throughout, such as 'To commence with', 'Another unavoidable downside', and 'Conversely'. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate distinct points, moving from economic drawbacks to healthcare strains, and finally addressing the counter-argument before the conclusion. However, referencing and transitions occasionally feel somewhat mechanical or formulaic ('To commence with', 'In other words'). Paragraphing in the body could also be tighter. Overall, the organization is coherent and easy to follow, aligning well with the Band 6 descriptor criteria.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, successfully incorporating topic-related terms like 'governing bodies', 'pension', 'financial burden', and 'vulnerable'. There are, however, noticeable spelling and word choice errors throughout the text, such as 'outwieghs', 'greter', 'attributedd' (attributed), and 'advices' (advice is uncountable). Less common items are attempted with occasional inaccuracies in collocation. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they prevent the essay from reaching a higher lexical band. Therefore, a Band 6.0 is appropriate.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The writer uses a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some control over subordinate clauses and conditional constructions. There are several error-free sentences, but a number of grammatical errors and awkward phrasings persist, such as 'states the having older people' (stating that having), 'life problem' (life problems), and missing articles or prepositions in places. Punctuation is generally acceptable, and meaning remains clear despite the errors. Because the grammatical range is moderately varied and errors do not impede communication, the performance fits comfortably into Band 6.0.

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