Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-29

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In this modern era, there's a large population of old age people which is advantageous to some extent and it also has some disadvantages. Old age people have a lot of concrete values nailed into their personalities which were extremly important for survival in the cruel capatalist focused world.

In this era of artificial intelligence and immense information across every platform, people know a little bit of everything which not only confuses them but is also a hindrance in their professional career path, this is where the old age experienced professionals come in with their wisdom and their values that they harnessed throughout the years of surving the rigged system.

First of all they guide the young generation so that they can navigate through life easily and avoid obstacles that their elders went through, that experienced advice alone outweighs any of the the disavantages that come off from having an aging population. Secondly, in this digital era of mobile phones and social media content, young people are facing a hard time staying sane, because the consumption of social media is creating alot of noise inside every young teenager and adult, which is creating an alarming emotional intelligence disability crisis, people are straying from what is important which is enjoying life. Having a person who's old and has spent his/her life working and navigating through life gives you a sense of security and calm not only providing you mental peace with their presence but also helping you realize the reason of living, having a young body which is free from any disease and most importantly to enjoy the beautiful life a person's been granted.

To conclude, I think having an aging population helps you significantly outweighing any of the disadvantages that can come off from them.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

The response addresses the prompt by discussing both the advantages and disadvantages of an aging population, taking a clear position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Ideas are presented, such as the wisdom and guidance that older generations provide to younger people facing modern pressures like social media overload. However, the development of ideas tends to be repetitive and relies heavily on general assertions rather than well-supported examples or specific data. While the stance is maintained throughout, the arguments lack depth in places, particularly regarding the economic or societal disadvantages mentioned only in passing. The response meets the task requirements adequately, but the arguments would benefit from more varied extension and concrete illustration to reach a higher band. Overall, the task is addressed with a recognizable position.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay demonstrates a basic logical progression and is organized into an introduction, body paragraphs, and a conclusion. Cohesive devices are used to signal transitions, such as 'First of all' and 'Secondly'. However, paragraphing is somewhat problematic; the main body is compressed into a single very long paragraph that attempts to handle multiple distinct points, making the overall structure feel somewhat unbalanced and breathless. Furthermore, referencing is occasionally unclear, and some sentences run on without appropriate punctuation or logical connectors, creating a choppy reading experience in places. While the overall meaning remains clear, the mechanical handling of cohesion and the lack of distinct paragraphing for separate ideas prevent it from achieving a higher score.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student attempts to use some less common vocabulary, such as 'advantageous', 'hindrance', 'emotional intelligence', and 'rigged system'. However, there are notable spelling errors and awkward collocations throughout the text, including 'old age people' instead of 'elderly people' or 'older adults', 'extremly' (extremely), 'capatalist' (capitalist), 'surving' (surviving), and 'disavantages' (disadvantages). Word choice is occasionally informal or repetitive, and some phrases lack precision. While the vocabulary used is adequate to convey the basic message and communicate the writer's ideas, the frequency of lexical inaccuracies and spelling errors restricts the score to this level.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The writer attempts a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating some ability to construct longer sentences with relative clauses and participial phrases, such as 'people know a little bit of everything which not only confuses them but is also a hindrance...'. However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent. There are frequent errors in punctuation, run-on sentences with comma splices (e.g., 'career path, this is where...'), and occasional preposition or article errors. Verb forms and agreement issues also appear, such as 'having a person who's old... gives you'. Although these errors rarely completely impede communication, they occur frequently enough across the text to prevent the response from reaching a higher band.

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