Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-09-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In a number of nations, the life span of human being is increasing day by day compared to past. while, advocates argue that older population is a curse for the state, others contend having elderly generation advantageous for us in many aspects. I firmly believe that older individuals are blessing for us beacuse they can shaped our life by providing essential information.

Advocates who argue that aging population is a great issue for the governments beacuse to provide them with sufficient healthcare government has to spend excessive amount of money. When people become older diverse kinds of diseases attack them and they become weak both physically and mentally. If the life span of individuals geating longer, the number of pateints also increase. However, they are not the earning citizens, to serve them with medical appliances government needs extra funding which is burden for the state.

However, despite this trivial issue elderly people has a great benefits on the society. As they are older they are much more experienced than other younger population. Therefore, in the crisis moments of a nation they can provide crucial information to tackle the problem. Besides, they can discuss many political issues comparing to the past events which favours the policy makers to implicate new laws according to the current situation. Additionall, older generations, for instance, grandfather or grandmother are grace for a families younger generations. Parents can easily leave out their children to their granparents without any anxiety when they go for works.Therefore, they do not need any childcare centre to look after their kids.

To infer, although there are some minor issues related to older generation, with proper planning and equal allocation of funding government can mitigate the problem. But the merits of having older people outweigh the demerits.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

The response addresses all parts of the task by discussing both the problems and benefits associated with an aging population and clearly states a personal position that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Ideas are extended and supported, such as examining healthcare burdens and the social contributions of older individuals like childcare and historical perspective. However, there is a tendency to over-generalise in places, and some arguments could be further developed with deeper analysis. For instance, the discussion on political issues and childcare touches on valid points but remains somewhat basic. Overall, the prompt is successfully addressed, meeting the criteria for a Band 6.5 or 7.0; it is best placed at Band 6.5 due to under-developed aspects in the body paragraphs.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The essay displays a generally coherent overall arrangement with a clear introduction, two body paragraphs exploring opposing views, and a brief conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate ideas. Cohesive devices are employed, such as 'However', 'Besides', and 'Therefore', but their usage is sometimes mechanical or repetitive (e.g., the repeated use of 'However' to start successive paragraphs). Referencing is generally clear, although transitions between sentences can feel abrupt at times, such as moving from political discussions to familial childcare within the same paragraph. Overall organisation is clear enough to earn a solid Band 6.0.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

The student demonstrates an adequate vocabulary range for the task, attempting some less common lexical items such as 'blessing', 'excessive amount', and 'allocation of funding'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word choice errors that detract from precision, such as 'human being' instead of 'human beings', 'beacuse', 'geating', 'pateints', and 'implicate laws' instead of 'implement laws'. While these errors do not impede overall communication, they prevent the writing from achieving a higher band. The lexical resource sits comfortably at Band 6.0, reflecting adequate range with occasional inaccuracies.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

The response features a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating attempts at subordination and relative clauses (e.g., 'When people become older diverse kinds of diseases attack them...'). However, grammatical accuracy is inconsistent, with frequent errors in articles, prepositions, subject-verb agreement, and word forms (e.g., 'life span of human being is increasing', 'older population is a curse', 'elderly people has a great benefits', 'leave out their children to their granparents'). Punctuation errors are also present, such as comma splices and incorrect capitalization ('Additionall', 'To infer'). The high frequency of non-systematic errors places this essay firmly at a Band 5.5.

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