Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-03

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In many countries, the life expetancy of people nowadays is longer than ever before. Some people believe that an elderly population creates issues for the government while others are of the view that the elderly people can benefit the society in many ways. The advantages of having an aging population is that the society can benefit from their experience and exposure. The disadvantages are that the elderly people can be a burden on the economy as they can't earn a living. I believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages.

The society can benefit from the experience and exposure that the elderly people have. They've studied, worked, and survived constant challenges that life threw at them. Therefore they can offer words of wisdom to young people going through tough times. This advice can prove to be fruitful as it comes from years of experience. For example, the elderly people who have worked in corporate for years can offer advice to young people starting their careers. They can also offer help in the areas they have worked in. Hence, they are a valueable to our society.

However, an increasing aging population can be a burden on the economy. The elderly people cannot work due to health issues or fatigue, therefore the government has to support their wellbeing by allocating funds to the pension system. With the rise in the elderly population, the funds assigned to the pension system will also have to be increased. Furthermore, with the increase in elderly population more shelter homes with trained staff will be required for their housing. For example, the number of old homes have drastically increased in Pakistan to accommodate the elderly people.

In conclusion, even though the elderly people may need support, such as pensions and shelters from the government, they have served the country for many years and can still be valueable due to adequate experience.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource6.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy6.0
Overall6.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response successfully addresses all parts of the prompt, establishing a clear position from the beginning that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. Relevant ideas are presented for both sides of the argument, such as utilizing the wisdom of older generations versus the economic strain on pension funds and healthcare systems. However, some ideas are more fully developed than others. For instance, the paragraph discussing the advantages relies heavily on general statements about corporate advice and wisdom without providing a fully realised, specific example. Meanwhile, the disadvantages are explored with more concrete references, such as the mention of old homes in Pakistan. To reach a higher band, all main arguments need to be extended with deeper, more specific support and fully fleshed-out examples throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay demonstrates a coherent overall arrangement with a clear logical progression from the introduction to body paragraphs and a concluding summary. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different facets of the prompt, with the first body paragraph focusing on benefits and the second focusing on drawbacks. Cohesive devices are employed to link ideas, such as "Therefore", "Hence", and "Furthermore", though referencing and cohesion can occasionally feel somewhat mechanical or repetitive. For example, sentences frequently start with similar transitional patterns. To move to a higher band, the writer should employ a wider and more flexible variety of cohesive devices while ensuring referencing is smoother and less predictable, avoiding a formulaic structural feel between paragraphs.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The student displays an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting less common lexical items such as "life expectancy", "fruitful", and "allocating funds". Communication is clear throughout, and the meaning is easily understood despite a few spelling and word-choice errors that hint at a need for greater precision. For instance, there is a spelling mistake with "expetancy", an awkward phrasing like "worked in corporate", and a word-form error in the second body paragraph where "valueable to our society" is missing a noun. To achieve a higher band, the writer needs to reduce these lexical inaccuracies and demonstrate a more precise, natural control over less common vocabulary and collocations.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

The writing exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence structures, showing the ability to construct multi-clause sentences using subordinating conjunctions like "even though" and "as". There are some errors in grammar and punctuation, but these occur infrequently and rarely impede communication. Examples of minor slips include the article omission in "valueable to our society" and slight awkwardness in subject-verb agreement or pluralisation patterns with phrases like "the elderly people can be a burden" versus "the increase in elderly population". To step up to a higher band, the writer must produce a greater frequency of error-free sentences while maintaining a wider, more ambitious variety of complex grammatical structures.

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