Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 4.5)

due to the presence of elder peop;e in the society , the people are connected to oneanother. a nation cannot progress until it has elder people in its society . elder people are the people who teaches their young one how to live , they teaches the young one how to face challenges and they teaches the teenagers the moral lesson from their own experiences . they develop character in us and tell us how to live . without them it we be quite difficult for us to succed in life and be a good person in society . it is obvious that they have lived their whole life and they have much more experience, skills and positive things which they tell us . otherwise it will be very chalenging for us to learn all those things in our lifetime .

my grand parents have told me about being patient and loving to other . they also told me not to fight with others and there power of managing the tasls and managing everything helps me kbnow how to manage things .

they keeps everyone united in a house . it is obviously favourable because they had lived their whole life and now they had many storied to tell like story of any fight or related to their life which they tell to their children and everyonr atays united and listen them furthrmore , they also keeps people religiously good they remind people to perform their prayers or other religious avctivities

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.0

The response responds to the task only minimally, touching upon the benefits of an aging population while largely neglecting the prompt's instruction to evaluate to what extent the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The ideas presented are very basic and lack proper extension or support. For instance, the writer states that elder people teach the young how to face challenges and develop character, but provides no specific examples or well-developed arguments to explain how this creates societal benefits. Furthermore, the discussion fails to address any potential problems associated with an aging population, offering only a one-sided and underdeveloped view of the topic.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.0

Information and ideas are not arranged coherently within the text. The response lacks clear logical progression, jumping abruptly between repetitive points about experience, moral lessons, and family unity. Paragraphing is extremely poor, with the entire text crammed into two unstructured blocks where sentences run together without adequate division. Cohesive devices are either missing or used very inaccurately, resulting in a disjointed structure that makes it difficult for the reader to follow a clear line of argument from one sentence to the next.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

The vocabulary used is basic and repetitive, relying heavily on simple terms like "people", "society", "life", and "things" throughout the response. There are frequent spelling errors and mechanical slips, such as "peop;e", "oneanother", "succed", "chalenging", "tasls", "kbnow", "storied", and "atays". Word choices are often strained or imprecise, and the repetition of basic phrases limits the lexical range. These noticeable lexical inaccuracies and spelling mistakes cause some difficulty for the reader and reflect a limited vocabulary suitable for the task.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 4.5

The writing demonstrates a very limited range of grammatical structures, consisting mostly of simple sentences linked by basic conjunctions or run-on clauses. Errors are frequent and often distort meaning, such as subject-verb agreement issues ("elder people who teaches", "they keeps everyone", "they had lived... now they had many storied"), missing articles, and incorrect pronoun usage ("without them it we be quite difficult"). Punctuation is also poorly handled, with spaces incorrectly placed before commas and periods, and a general lack of control over complex sentence forms.

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