Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some viewpoints believe that ageing population create difficulties for goverments. However, others oppose this by arguing that society get great advantages due to the elderly population. I believe elderly people benefits the society in multiple aspects and their presence should be celebrated and re-joiced.

One one hand, having elderly people around equips you with great knowledge and experience. They impart their learnings and life lessons to young generation who can utilise those teachings in their lives and get successful. For instance, many a times, I personally go to my grand mother for advices pertaining to life matters example, higher education, dealing with parents as she has seen it all, and have more wholistic and in-depth understanding of situations that I at this stage do not necessarily possess. Subsequently, it creates a sense of belonging and unity within a family, as everyone does consult the elderly, and everything is decided with communal opinion.

Moreover, grandparents in families may take up the responsibiliy of take care of their grand children, while their parents can work. Hence, it helps with sustaining better living standards and progression of economy as a whole. As in urban Pakistan, it is a trend that grandparents are the caregivers of their grandchildren, while their parents are unavailabe trying to make the ends meet.

On the other hand, it is argued that having elderly population leads to increase goverment expenditure on pension, insurance and healthcare. It carries a great opportunity cost for the goverment, as that money can be invested in more productive activity including building schools or industries. for instance, in Japan they have to invest excessively on elderly population due to their birth cap in pervious years. However, that expenditure could be done to progress the economy and building future out of young generations.

To conclude, Having elderly people in the country is fruitful for its generations as they are the primary knolwedge bearers, and they hold the communties together through their communal mindsets. However, the investment from the goverment on their healthcare and pensions can provide to be deterimental.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

The response addresses all parts of the task and presents a clear position throughout, acknowledging both sides of the issue before concluding that the benefits outweigh the drawbacks. Relevant ideas are introduced, but some are more fully developed than others. For example, while the discussion on grandparents providing childcare and emotional support in families is extended with a relevant personal and regional example regarding urban Pakistan, the counter-argument regarding government expenditure and the reference to Japan remain somewhat generalised and lack deep extension. To reach a higher band, the writer needs to fully develop all main ideas with more robust elaboration and specific supporting evidence rather than relying on brief assertions.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The essay displays a coherent overall arrangement with a clear progression of ideas from the advantages to the disadvantages and finally to a conclusion. Paragraphing is used appropriately to separate different main themes, such as family benefits and economic impacts. However, cohesion is sometimes mechanical or faulty, as seen with transitional phrases like 'One one hand' instead of 'On the one hand'. Referencing is occasionally slightly unclear, and cohesive devices are not always used with complete flexibility. To improve, the writer should ensure smoother transitions between sentences and paragraphs and employ a more varied and natural range of cohesive devices to link ideas seamlessly.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

The writer demonstrates an adequate range of vocabulary for the task, attempting some less common lexical items such as 'impart', 'wholistic', 'opportunity cost', and 'detrimental'. However, there are noticeable spelling and word-choice errors that occasionally detract from the precision of the writing, such as 'ageing population create', 'goverments', 'grand mother', 'wholistic' instead of 'holistic', 'unavailabe', 'knolwedge', and 'communties'. These errors do not impede overall communication, but they prevent the writing from achieving a higher band. To advance, the writer needs to refine word choices, improve spelling accuracy, and demonstrate a more precise control over collocations and less common vocabulary.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

The response exhibits a mix of simple and complex sentence forms, demonstrating an attempt to use varied structures. However, there are some persistent errors in grammar and punctuation throughout the text. Examples include subject-verb agreement issues like 'ageing population create', article omissions such as 'building future out of young generations', and awkward phrasing like 'the expenditure could be done to progress the economy'. Punctuation errors, such as missing commas in introductory clauses and uncapitalised words like 'for instance', also occur. These errors rarely impede communication, but they reflect a limited control over complex structures. To improve, the writer must focus on enhancing grammatical accuracy, particularly regarding articles, subject-verb agreement, and complex clause construction.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.