Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-06

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In majority of countries, citizens are presently surviving greater than expected in recent years. Certain people argues that old aged people generates difficulties for the government authorities.While others say it shows benifical impact on the society.This essay will examine both the advantages and disadvantages of an aging population and argue that the former outweigh the later.

Senior citizens show significant contribution in the upbringing of future generation by sharing morals and values,it helps the child to think logically and emotionally at the same time, this abilty will help the child to behave with maturity which is essential for smooth running of life.Moreover, elderly people helps to retain the cultural significance of the country by celebrating each festival with same enthusiasm and tradition as their ansecters used to do. For instance, an aging group of people living in Saudi Arabia celebrates Eid-ul-Adha the same way as the prophets use to do which helps the entire world to witness their cultural and traditional behaviour.

On the other hand,work load on the government bodies increases with increase in population, which simultaniously leads to rise in budget for distribution of pensions to the elderly people, which they are supposed to get in the first week of the month,feels like a budden to the managing goverment policies. Furthermore, rise in aging group is propotional to the population, which leads to decrease in mortality rate. For example, In China the number of old aged people are increasing day by day which directly effects mortality rate to decrease and creating huge disturbances to the ruling authorities.

In conclusion, the limitations of aging population like increased amount of pension and population,its benifits such as learing morals, values and retain culture are greater.With sustainable practices its minuses can be minimised making old age people valuable part of the society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and state a clear position: “the former outweigh the latter.” The discussion of older people passing on values and preserving cultural traditions is relevant, and the pension burden gives a disadvantage. However, the advantages are developed more fully than the disadvantages, and some reasoning is unclear. In particular, the claim that a larger aging population “leads to decrease in mortality rate” does not clearly explain why this is a problem for governments; population aging and mortality rates are not linked in the way the example suggests. The Saudi Arabia example illustrates cultural continuity but would be stronger if its relevance to wider social benefits were explained. Develop each point with a clearer cause-and-effect explanation and support your overall judgement more directly.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a coherent overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “Moreover,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the main stages. However, some connections are mechanical or unclear, and several sentences contain multiple ideas joined together, making the progression harder to follow. For example, the sentence about pensions combines increased workload, budget rises, payment timing, and a burden on government policies without clearly showing how these points relate. The China example also does not clearly support the preceding claim. Use shorter, more focused sentences and make references explicit; ensure each example directly illustrates the point in its paragraph.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “cultural significance,” “distribution of pensions,” “mortality rate,” and “sustainable practices.” This gives you some range, but inaccurate word choice, spelling, and collocation are noticeable and sometimes make the meaning difficult to interpret. Examples include “surviving greater than expected” for living longer, “old aged people,” “budden,” and “propotional to the population.” “The former outweigh the later” also uses the wrong form of “latter.” Aim for accurate, natural combinations rather than choosing formal-sounding words that do not fit the meaning. Proofread spelling carefully and learn common phrases for this topic, such as “an ageing population,” “pension expenditure,” and “pressure on public services.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentence forms, including clauses with “which” and “by sharing,” and the overall meaning is usually recoverable. However, errors in agreement, articles, sentence boundaries, and punctuation recur. For example, “Certain people argues” should have subject–verb agreement, while “elderly people helps” has the same issue. The opening also runs “authorities.While” together, and several long sentences use commas where a full stop or clearer clause structure is needed. Some constructions, such as “it helps the child … this ability will help,” join separate statements without adequate punctuation. Practise checking each sentence for a clear subject and verb, correct agreement, and a complete boundary between independent clauses.

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