Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-09

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In many countries, the life expectnacy increased than ever before. Some people argue that an aging population can cause problems for governments, while others believe that there are benefits if society has more elderly peoply. I believe that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages to some extent.

On the one hand, elder people can contribute in raising children and can also pass the culture to young generation. Elder people naturally have the ability to care children and can help to look after children of working parents. This enables parents to work freely and be effective in their work. In addition, aged people can significantly contribute in transferring the culture to the younger generation and this helps to create a society.

on the other hand, aging population can affect the economy of a country. Aged people due to age related ilnesses demand high quality of healthcare and this forces governments to invest more on the healthcare. This means to stabilize the economy governments put pressure on working people by increasing taxes and this can affect economy of the country. But this canbe managed by participating aged people in community service which they can help in raising children and in turn the society be benefited.

In conclusion, although aging population can affect economy of country this can be managed by participating them in community service which helps to create a healthy so

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both sides of the question and state a position: “the advantages outweigh the disadvantages to some extent.” Relevant benefits include helping working parents with childcare and passing culture to younger generations, while the healthcare costs and tax burden form a disadvantage. However, these points are brief and the conclusion is cut off, so the extent of your judgement is not fully explained. The claim that community service can manage the economic impact is also asserted rather than supported with a clear example or explanation. The response contains 221 words, below the required 250; the eight words copied from the prompt were not counted. Develop each main point with explanation or a relevant example, and complete the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph presenting benefits, a paragraph on costs, and a concluding attempt. Linking phrases such as “On the one hand,” “In addition,” and “In conclusion” help signal the direction of the argument. However, progression is limited because ideas within paragraphs are not consistently developed, and the final sentence ends abruptly at “a healthy so,” leaving the conclusion incomplete. The transition from the economic burden to community service is also sudden. Use clearer links to show how each point supports your overall position, and ensure each paragraph has a complete central idea and the essay ends with a finished conclusion.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use a relevant set of topic words, including “aging population,” “healthcare,” “working parents,” and “younger generation,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling or word-choice errors reduce accuracy, such as “expectnacy,” “peoply,” “ilnesses,” and “canbe.” Some phrases are also imprecise or unnatural, including “create a society” and “invest more on the healthcare.” Aim for more precise collocations and check spelling carefully. For example, you could describe older people as helping to “preserve cultural traditions,” and say governments “spend more on healthcare.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a relative clause in “aged people … demand high quality of healthcare” and a conditional-style explanation of the tax effect. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. Examples include “the life expectancy increased” (the verb form is unsuitable here), “help to look after children” after “can,” and “this can affect economy of the country,” which lacks necessary articles. The final sentence is incomplete, and sentence-initial “on the other hand” should be capitalised. Practise accurate article use, verb forms, and complete sentence construction before adding more complex structures.

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