Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-10

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In most part of the world, individuals life span increases as compared to the past. Few individuals think that aging population can generate predicaments for the government while other believes that there will be more significant advantages of having graeater number of senior citizens. As soon as, science get control on diseaes, the ratio of old citizens rises abruptly. In this essay, I will demonstrate both views as well as its importance.

In contemporary society, technology gain a strong position in the field of health by reducing the risk of chronic diseases which were a nightmare in near past when there were not a proper treatment for a minor diseases also. In this way, normal lifespan of people accelerated than normal so the elder individuals who are cured easily get longlives. This dramatic rise in senior citiens create further problems for officials to manage new and previous employment opportunities respectively. There will also be a young labour recquired to perform heavy tasks which are not feasible for elders.

On the other hand, some people suggests that it is good to have elders more in number than youngsters and the reason behind this is social pressure, more disciplined way of life and their experience also. They think that senior have more knowledge and information than new commers thats way they utilize their thoughts effectively in contrast to young people.

Elders are more more task oriented, motivated and keen towards any activity as well as they are curious to complete that project which they initiated first instead of pocking nose in everything at a time.

In conclusion, both groups are fundamental in completion of any society, elders are the people who are rational and believe in process as well as hardwork however, youngsters are smart people who like to get their work done in seconds. The key is to establish balance among them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both sides of the question and give a concluding view that society needs a balance between older and younger people. However, the response only partially answers the key question of whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages: the conclusion does not clearly choose a side, and the discussion of disadvantages is brief and vague. For example, you mention pressure on employment opportunities and the need for young workers to do heavy tasks, but do not explain the scale or consequences of these problems. The benefits—such as elders’ experience and discipline—are also asserted rather than supported with a specific example. To strengthen the response, state your position clearly and develop each main point with explanation or a relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, discussion of disadvantages, a benefits paragraph and a conclusion. Basic signposting such as “On the other hand” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the broad direction. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven: the opening discussion moves from medical advances to employment without clearly explaining the connection, while the benefits paragraph lists social pressure, discipline and experience without developing their relationships. The separate sentence about elders being task-oriented also interrupts the paragraph’s flow. Some linking is mechanical, and references such as “both groups” could be more precise. Organise each body paragraph around one clear claim, then explain and illustrate it before moving to the next point.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “chronic diseases,” “senior citizens,” “employment opportunities” and “social pressure.” These choices show an effort to discuss the issue beyond very basic terms. However, the range is limited by frequent spelling errors and inaccurate or unnatural word combinations, which sometimes make the meaning difficult to follow. Examples include “graeater,” “diseaes,” “longlives,” and “pocking nose”; “predicaments” and “accelerated” are also not natural choices in their contexts. Aim for accurate, conventional collocations and check spelling carefully. Using precise phrases such as “the proportion of older people,” “strain on public services” and “valuable work experience” would make your ideas clearer and more appropriate to an academic essay.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including clauses introduced by “while,” “which” and “as soon as.” This gives the response some structural variety, but complex sentences are often faulty, and frequent errors affect clarity. For example, “individuals life span increases” has problems with possession and subject–verb agreement, while “science get control” and “some people suggests” have incorrect verb forms. Articles and plurals are also inconsistent, as in “a minor diseases” and “there were not a proper treatment.” Several sentences run together or use punctuation awkwardly, particularly the long sentence beginning “Elders are more more task oriented.” Review agreement, articles and sentence boundaries, and build complex sentences with one clear main clause.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.