Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-11

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In recent times, people have longer life span as compare to previous times. Although some people argue that senior citizens puts more pressure on the higher authorities, while other think that aging individuals may have advantages for the society. this essay will discuss both perspectives.

On the one hand, those who support the idea that older people may have benefits for the society believe this because of life experience and knowledge. This is due to the fact that when there are more elder people in the scoiety, they have more experience and knowledge, due to which they can guide younger generation and help them to resolve issues in life. For example, if a civilisation has more older people, it facilitates to gain more knowledge about the cultural heritage and history to conserve it for the long run. Therefore, it serves society in enormous ways, which helps to adopt more good values.

On the other hand, opponents argue that aging citizens creates troubles for governments, as they claim that it creates economical crices which means governments have to provides basic facilities to the emence population, which creates financial burden on the higher authorities. moeover, it is hard for them to handle highly dense nation with elder people because they need more medical and monetory assistance, as they become dependent at this age.

In conclusion, even though some people support the notion of high population of the elder people, I believe that older people create problems for governments becaue of underemployment which means they have to generate more employment for the country to satistfy adults and older peole.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.0
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question and give a clear overall view in the conclusion: you believe the disadvantages for governments are greater. The discussion of older people’s experience, cultural knowledge and guidance is relevant, as is the point about medical support and public spending. However, the response only partially answers the key question of how far the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The benefits paragraph is more developed than the conclusion’s reasoning, while the final claim about “underemployment” and generating employment is not clearly connected to the earlier argument. Develop and compare the two sides more directly, explaining why one has greater weight and supporting that judgement with a specific example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the broad direction. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes mechanical, with repeated cause-and-effect links such as “This is due to the fact” and “due to which.” Some references are also unclear: “it creates economical crices” does not specify what “it” refers to, and the conclusion introduces underemployment without preparing for it earlier. Build clearer links between each claim and its explanation, and make the conclusion follow directly from the arguments already presented.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You attempt topic-related vocabulary, including “senior citizens,” “cultural heritage,” “financial burden,” and “medical assistance,” which helps communicate the main ideas. However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling, word-form, and collocation errors make parts less clear or natural. Examples include “scoiety,” “crices,” “emence,” and “monetory,” as well as “economical crices” where a more natural phrase is needed. Expressions such as “higher authorities” are repeated and are less precise than “governments” or “public authorities.” Aim to use a smaller set of accurate, natural phrases and check spelling and collocations carefully; this would make your meaning easier to follow.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including a concession in “Although some people argue…” and a reason clause beginning “because.” However, complex structures are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “senior citizens puts” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “governments have to provides” uses the wrong verb form after “have to.” The opening “Although…” clause is left without a properly connected main clause, and “this essay” should begin with a capital letter. Practise building complete sentences with one clear main clause, then check agreement and verb forms. More accurate control of these patterns would make your arguments substantially easier to understand.

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