Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Life expectancy of the people is increasing in the majority of the country in the world. Many people argue that having the high number of elderly people creates chaos while the others argue that aging population is beneficial for the society. I believe that old people are more advantageous to the country and its economy. The advantages definitely outweigh the disadvantages.

Old people on the one hand, are the root of the generation today. They have significant experience in life and elderly people could be parents, grandparents, great grandparents who can guide each family about how to run smooth household and lasting conjugal relationship. Not only that, old leaders and old governments have faced challenges and struggles in their life. They could teach the new generation about how to run an administration, transform Gross Domestic Product and Gross National Income of a nation.

On the other hand, aging population are laggards as they can't accept change too soon. They are too comfortable with old traditions and systems which can also be inedible to swallow promoting patriarchy especially in the country like Nepal. Elderly are physically weak who are inactive population contributing less on earning the livelihood of a family. Older generations lack the technique to operate the newer technologies and are stubborn on following the norms of the latest generation which can harm to move forward and accept innovations.

In conclusion, though aging people are more experienced and can motivate new generation, they can also be arduous to accept new norms and innovations.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear from the introduction: you believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, and the essay discusses both sides before concluding. The benefits you identify—older people’s family guidance and experience in leadership—are relevant, as are concerns about resistance to change and reduced physical capacity. However, the advantages are asserted more than demonstrated: for example, the claim that older leaders can improve national income needs a specific explanation or example. The disadvantages are also listed without weighing their impact against the benefits, so the conclusion does not fully establish why the advantages outweigh them. Develop fewer points with clearer support and make the comparison explicit throughout.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for advantages and disadvantages, and a conclusion. The contrastive signposting in “On the other hand” helps readers follow the shift in viewpoint. However, the first body paragraph begins with “on the one hand” but does not clearly set up a balanced comparison, and several ideas are crowded together, moving from family relationships to government and economic performance. The conclusion briefly repeats the main ideas but does not synthesise the comparison. Use clearer topic sentences, group related examples, and connect each point to the central question of whether benefits outweigh costs. Some linking phrases feel formulaic rather than showing precise relationships between ideas.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You attempt a range of topic-related vocabulary, including “life expectancy,” “aging population,” “administration,” and “innovations,” and the main meaning is generally understandable. There are also attempts at less common expressions, but some are inaccurate or unnatural in context: “creates chaos,” “inedible to swallow,” and “arduous to accept” do not express the intended ideas precisely. “Laggards” is also an overly negative and broad label for older people, while “transform Gross Domestic Product” is an unnatural collocation. These choices sometimes make the argument less clear and weaken the appropriate academic tone. Aim for precise, natural collocations and use less common vocabulary only when you are confident of its meaning and fit.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use both simple and more complex sentence forms, including the structure “Not only that, old leaders and old governments have faced challenges…” and a concessive clause in the conclusion. Most sentences communicate the intended meaning, but some grammatical errors remain. For example, “in the majority of the country” needs a plural form, and “aging population are laggards” has a subject–verb agreement problem. The sentence beginning “Elderly are physically weak” also lacks an article or plural noun form, and “which can harm to move forward” has an incomplete grammatical pattern. Review articles, agreement, and clause construction, then proofread longer sentences to ensure each clause is complete and correctly connected.

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