Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-14

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

After modern innovation and discovery of new drugs, people are now able to live longer compared to past time. Some people argue that having elder people in you society is more beneficial because they can help in our decisions with their experience. However, other people resist this suggestion and think that it wil cause more problems to society because they cannot contribute to society and will put extra burden on other people.

There are some benefits of having elder people in our homes because nowadays, people are very busy in their work and passing through stressful life. In such situation, everone need someone to guide them to the right path and elder people can do this with their experience. For example, once my brother was coming from a city and it was late. My father told him to sit in islamabad car but he confirmed his seat in mardan bus. After getting down from bus in mardan. He realized that there is no transport to our home from there at that time and ended up in a big mess. However, elder people are burden as well on society

On the hand, elder people are sometime hectic for others. Aged people need extra care but people are now busy in their life and have no time for them. In addition, they are not contributing to society and become obligation. For example, many elder people cannot walk, cannot eat so, an extra person must be in home for their responsibilties.

In my opinion, having elder people has many advantages compared to disadvantages because we can take care of them as they did for us when we were childrens. Their availability and experience matters most.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You present a clear overall view that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, and you give relevant points about older people’s experience and their need for care. The example involving your father’s travel advice helps illustrate how an older person’s guidance can be useful. However, the response addresses the comparison only partially: the benefits are mainly limited to advice within the family, while the disadvantages are stated broadly, such as older people being unable to contribute. The claim that they are a burden is also not reconciled with your final view. To strengthen the response, explain the wider social benefits and costs, and develop each point with clearer reasoning and relevant examples.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate discussion of benefits and disadvantages, and a concluding opinion. Basic linking phrases such as “However,” “In addition,” and “For example” help signal relationships between ideas. Nevertheless, progression is uneven: the first body paragraph ends abruptly with “elder people are burden as well on society,” before the next paragraph begins the disadvantages. The travel anecdote is also lengthy relative to the point it supports, and the conclusion repeats the opinion without summarising the comparison. Use clearer topic sentences, keep examples focused, and connect each paragraph’s final point to the next stage of the argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including terms such as “experience,” “extra care,” “burden,” and “advantages.” However, the range is limited and several expressions are inaccurate or unnatural, which sometimes makes the reader pause. Examples include “elder people,” “passing through stressful life,” “hectic for others,” and “become obligation.” Spelling errors such as “everone,” “wil,” and “responsibilties” also reduce accuracy. Aim to learn common collocations for this topic and check spelling carefully. More precise wording would help distinguish between older people’s contributions, their care needs, and the costs associated with an aging population.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including clauses beginning with “because” and “when,” and your main meaning is generally understandable. However, errors are frequent, and some complex sentences are difficult to follow. For example, “After getting down from bus in mardan” is a sentence fragment, while “many elder people cannot walk, cannot eat so, an extra person must be in home” has faulty clause structure and punctuation. There are also problems with articles, agreement, and verb forms, as in “everone need” and “we were childrens.” Practise building complete sentences with clear subjects and verbs, and check agreement, articles, plurals, and punctuation when editing.

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