Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Recently in a large number of countries , people start living longer than in the past. some people think if a community has a large proportion of elders population, it produces problems. While others believe having a high percentage of older people is beneficial. I believe the disadvantages of having high elders population outweigh its advatages.

One major advantage of having high population of older people is that the level of wisdome and experience increases. Elder people have more experiences compared to young. They have solved many difficult situation in their field. Additionally, they have faced many issuses so they become experits. Some youg people if they have problems, they will take the advice from olders becuase he thought older may had the same problem in the past. For instance, the manger or the CEO of many companies are given to older poeple becuse they have more working years experience as result, having them in the company will be a beneficial.

Despite these advantages, there are many drawbacks to consider the most significant one is aging population need younger one to take care of them and to facilitate the life for them. If the the population of olders in a country is high the givernment has to spend huge amount of money for younger ones to take care of the elderly ones. For example, many countries nowdays seeking for young people to move from their countries becuase they are facing a shortage in young population due to the high rates of olders population.

In conclusion, although having high aging population can be beneficial to society. I believe that its disadvantages outweigh its advantages.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

Your position is clear: you believe the disadvantages outweigh the advantages, and you address both sides of the question. The paragraph on older people’s wisdom and experience gives a relevant advantage, while the discussion of care needs and government spending presents a relevant disadvantage. The company-leadership example helps illustrate experience, although the claim that older people are generally given CEO roles is broad and would benefit from a more precise example. The disadvantage is less fully explained: clarify how care costs affect public budgets or younger workers, and compare this impact directly with the benefits you describe. This would make your evaluation of how far the disadvantages outweigh the advantages more convincing.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction states your view, separate body paragraphs discuss an advantage and a disadvantage, and the conclusion restates your position. Linking expressions such as “Additionally,” “Despite these advantages,” and “For instance” help readers follow the progression. This organisation is effective, and the main ideas are generally easy to identify. To make the flow more natural and precise, avoid relying on formulaic transitions and strengthen links between claims and examples. For instance, explain explicitly how the example of companies supports the point about social benefits, and use clearer references than “them” or “they” where the people being discussed could be ambiguous.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “wisdom,” “experience,” “population,” “government,” and “shortage,” so the main ideas can be understood. However, the range and control are limited by repeated wording such as “older people” and “high population,” as well as inaccurate word forms, spelling, and collocations. Examples include “elders population,” “experits,” “advatages,” and “working years experience.” These errors sometimes make the reader pause to interpret your meaning. Build a more precise set of expressions for ageing and public care, and check spelling and word forms carefully. Using alternatives such as “older adults,” “ageing population,” and “professional experience” would improve clarity and variety.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including a contrast with “While others believe…” and a conditional sentence beginning “If the population…”. However, complex structures are often not controlled accurately, and errors in sentence boundaries, agreement, articles, and verb forms recur. For example, “people start living longer” needs a suitable tense for a continuing trend, while “aging population need younger one” has problems with agreement and singular/plural forms. The opening “While others believe…” is also a fragment because it is not joined to a main clause. Practise building complete sentences with one clear main clause, then check subject–verb agreement and articles. More accurate control of these patterns would make your argument easier to read.

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