Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-20

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

The life span of average people has increased in several states. Some people argue that it would rise issues for government while some people thinks that having more senior people in society would be more beneficial. I think the advantages of having aged people in our society outweigh the disadvantages.

Firstly, the presence of more aged people will make the lives of younger more easy. Because those who lived their life has more experience as compared to a young person. The young citizens could approach their seniors in every difficult situation for consultation or lessons. For example, If a fresh graduate of law face any difficulty in his legal profession he can directly ask for solution from any retired lawyer or judge. Secondly, most of the time both man and woman from a family are on their jobs and there is no one left behide who could take care of home and childrens. Incase if their elderly parents are alive so they could take care of it.

On the other hand, some people argue that having more aged population could cause problems for government as well as for the rest of population. If there are more elderly population without having any skills they will automatically relay on government. The government will be responsible for their expenses and for that purpose governement would pay pention to them. Which will bring up more burden over the finances of state. For instance, If a country has 60% of population which is above 60 years and each aged citizen gets their pention from government funds this would bring a greater pressure over the annual budget of a state.

In conclusion, although having more number of senior citizen could bring burden over the state but there are always more advantages of having aged people around us. Because they are always more experienced then youngester and they could also help out their childrens in many other ways by providing support to them.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response6.5
Coherence and Cohesion6.5
Lexical Resource5.0
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.0
Overall6.0

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

Your position is clear from the introduction and conclusion: you believe the benefits of an ageing population outweigh the costs. You address both sides and give relevant examples, including older people advising a new lawyer and helping with childcare, as well as the pressure pensions may place on public finances. This covers the task well. However, some points are asserted rather than fully explained: for example, the claim that elderly parents can care for the home and children would benefit from explaining when this is realistic and how widespread the benefit might be. The pension example is also hypothetical and could be linked more directly to the scale of the disadvantage. Developing these points and weighing them against each other more explicitly would make the argument more complete.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, a paragraph on disadvantages, and a conclusion. The contrast signalled by “Firstly” and “On the other hand” helps readers follow the main progression, and the examples are placed alongside the relevant claims. Some connections are less smooth or precise, however. “Because those who lived their life…” is separated as a fragment, while “Which will bring up more burden…” also begins an incomplete sentence. The conclusion repeats the main position but does not clearly compare the two sides. Use complete sentences, make references such as “it” and “they” unambiguous, and add linking language that explains how each example supports the overall judgement.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “elderly,” “consultation,” “retired lawyer,” “pension,” and “annual budget.” However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are noticeably inaccurate, sometimes making the reader pause. Examples include “rise issues” for creating or raising problems, “relay on” for rely on, and “bring up more burden” for place a greater burden. Spelling errors such as “governement,” “pention,” and “behinde” also weaken control. Aim to learn common word partnerships for this topic and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you express the economic and social arguments without relying repeatedly on “aged people” and “more advantages.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex structures, including conditional clauses such as “If there are more elderly population…” and a relative clause in “those who lived their life…”. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to affect ease of reading. For example, “some people thinks” has subject–verb disagreement, “a fresh graduate … face” needs a matching verb form, and “Because those who lived their life…” is an incomplete sentence. “Which will bring up…” is another sentence fragment, while “both man and woman … are on their jobs” has problems with number and sentence construction. Practise agreement, articles, plurals, and complete clause structure. Separating long ideas into accurate sentences will improve clarity while you build greater control of complex forms.

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