Band 6.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-21

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.5)

In the contemporary society, there is an increase in the life span of people that is never experienced before. Some people argue that an aging population leads to several issues for states; however, other contend that it is more advantageous to have more aged people in the society. Despite some health concerns, aging has numerous advantages as elderly people are more experienced and expert problem solvers.

As people grow old, there health deteriorates. This one of the major disadvantages of aging. Older people have to deal with numerous health problems including heart failures, organ damage and psychological issue. Resultantly, in order to cope with elderly population, state officials may need to invest more in health sector. This might bring extra burden on governments. For instance, the more elderly people in a country, the more likely it is for policy makers to build hospitals rather than focusing on other essential investments. This suggests that aging might be less favorable for the nations.

Keeping in mind its disadvantages, I am of an opinion that old people bring more benefits to the society. Elderly people are more experienced with enhanced field knowledge. Owing to this they may add value to the GDP of a country. Not only this but elderly citizens, on the basis of their experiences, are efficient workers and problem solvers. They know more nuances of the tools they are using, and thus lead to positive outcomes. Moreover, they may also good at team work and relationship building that foster positivity and healthy work environment. All these evidences indicate that old individual are beneficial to the society and that governments do not need to spend money on awareness drives to teach them as they have to do for taming young citizens. For instance, old people are more are more aware of road safety rather than youth suggesting that governments will not be worried about teaching them.

To conclude, it is widely debated that aging increases problems for government bodies. Although disadvantages of having aged population can never be overlooked,I believed it have multiple advantages including efficiency, problem solving and better work ethics. Ultimately, elderly individuals may prove as a great workforce for a nation.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both sides of the question and state a clear position: despite health-related costs, you believe the benefits outweigh the disadvantages. The discussion of pressure on health services is relevant, and you support it with an example about governments prioritising hospitals. You also identify experience, problem-solving and workplace relationships as potential benefits. This meets the task well, but some points are asserted rather than fully explained. For example, the claim that older workers “may add value to the GDP” would be stronger with a clear explanation of how their expertise contributes, while the road-safety example is only loosely connected to the main argument. Develop the strongest benefits with specific, realistic examples and make the comparison of advantages and costs more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on disadvantages, a paragraph on advantages and a conclusion. The contrast signalled by “Despite some health concerns” and “Keeping in mind its disadvantages” helps readers follow your position, and the conclusion returns to your main view. This is a coherent arrangement, though progression within the advantages paragraph is less controlled: several claims about expertise, teamwork, awareness and road safety are added in sequence without always showing how they connect or which is most important. Some linking phrases, such as “Not only this but” and “All these evidences indicate,” feel mechanical or imprecise. Group related points and use clearer references and transitions to show the relationship between each example and your argument.

Lexical Resource: Band 6.0

You use an adequate range of topic vocabulary, including “life span,” “health sector,” “GDP,” “problem solvers” and “work environment.” There are also attempts at more formal phrasing, such as “Owing to this” and “foster positivity.” However, some word choices and collocations are inaccurate or unnatural, which limits precision: “heart failures” would usually be “heart failure,” “enhanced field knowledge” is unclear, and “taming young citizens” is unsuitable for this context. Repetition of “elderly people” and “old people” also reduces flexibility. Aim for natural, precise combinations rather than formal-sounding phrases, and check word forms and spelling, including “evidences,” which should be “evidence” when used as an uncountable noun.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 6.0

You attempt a mix of simple and complex structures, including a concessive opening (“Despite some health concerns”) and the inversion “Not only this but elderly citizens…”. Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors occur across the response. Examples include “other contend” instead of “others contend,” “there health” instead of “their health,” and the incomplete clause “This one of the major disadvantages.” There are also errors in agreement and verb forms, as in “old individual are beneficial” and “it have multiple advantages.” Punctuation and spacing need attention in “overlooked,I believed.” Review subject–verb agreement, possessives, articles and complete sentence structure; then proofread for consistent verb forms and sentence boundaries.

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