Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-23

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is oftern debeted whether individuals are now living longer than ever before. Mnay people believe that elderly population creates problems for governments, while other citizen argued that there are benefits if society has more older people. I believe that the advantages of this trend far outweigh of the disadvantages.

On the one hand, the major disadvantage of aging population is creates many problems for governments. This is because older people generally have a more time than adult people, which can create health problems for governments. In addition, elderly population not only create health problems, but also creates financial problems for governments. For example, governments can help elder citizen to basic monthly pay rate and provide bsic health facilities. As a result, aging population create some problem for goverments.

On the other hand, the main primary advantage of society if elderly people more in country, which i believe is more prctical view. This is mainly because when elderly individuals more in country, they can help society to teach seance of humor and basic civic sence. Moreover, older people not only teach basic civic sence but also share their whole life experience to children and adult people. For instance, older people can teach children to traditional story, which can enjoy and learn children. Consequently, there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

In conclusion, although there are valid arguments for aging population creates problems for governments. I believe that the advantages of this trend far outweigh of the disadvantages because they teach adult to whole life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You present a clear overall view that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, and you include a paragraph for each side with relevant examples, such as older people sharing stories with children. However, the response only partially develops the comparison: the disadvantages are explained mainly through government costs, while the claimed benefits of teaching civic sense and sharing experience are not clearly connected to wider social advantages. The conclusion repeats your position but does not fully resolve this imbalance. The response is also 247 words, so it falls three words short of the 250-word minimum; the nine words copied from the task prompt are not counted. Develop each main point with clearer explanation and support, and ensure the response meets the required length.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for disadvantages and advantages, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” helps the reader follow the broad direction. However, progression within paragraphs is often repetitive or unclear. For example, the disadvantage paragraph repeats that an aging population creates problems for governments, while the advantage paragraph moves from civic sense to life experience without explaining how these points build on one another. Some linking phrases, including “As a result” and “Consequently,” introduce conclusions that largely repeat earlier claims. Use clearer topic sentences and develop each point in a logical sequence, with references that make the relationship between ideas explicit.

Lexical Resource: Band 4.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “aging population,” “financial problems,” “health facilities,” and “life experience,” and you attempt phrases such as “civic sense.” However, the range is limited and several word-choice, collocation, and spelling errors make parts difficult to understand. Examples include “more practical view,” “teach seance of humor,” and “basic monthly pay rate”; these do not express the intended ideas naturally. Misspellings such as “oftern,” “debeted,” and “goverments” also reduce clarity. Build a more accurate set of phrases for discussing public costs and social contributions, and check spelling carefully. More precise vocabulary would help you explain your position without relying on repeated general terms such as “problems” and “benefits.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt a few complex forms, including “although” and “not only…but also,” and the overall meaning can usually be followed. However, the range of sentence structures is limited, and errors are frequent, particularly in verb forms, agreement, and sentence construction. For example, “the major disadvantage … is creates” lacks a correct verb pattern, while “elderly population not only create … but also creates” has inconsistent agreement. The conclusion’s “although there are valid arguments for aging population creates problems” also combines structures incorrectly. Practise building accurate simple sentences first, then add subordinate clauses and paired conjunctions. Check that each sentence has a complete main clause and that subjects and verbs agree.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.