Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-24

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

It is argued,that people in many countries are living more than ever.Which tends to great increase in the elderly population.Many think that having elderly people is a advantage,but other think aging population makes issues.

In my opinion, having elderly people is a blessing from God.Because they have experienced the world more than us.We can have good advices from the elders.They can tell us what is wrong and what is good.Now in many countries,there is significant increase in the elderly people.From my perspective,those are the blessed countries.It is true that, for hard works like contruc

tions and modern computer fields,elder people cannot do any anything.For the progressive working,we need a strong youth.So that development would not stop.In the modern era,the technology have become so advanced,that only the young generations know the functioning of the new technologies.

And it is true that,aging population makes issues for the government.Furthermore the increase in the aging population increases the expenditures of the old homes.Old home is the place where elderly people enjoy their old lifeFurthermore,they are provided with good foods and other facilities and most importantly facility of health care.All these facility is a burden on the government.So which makes problems for the government to provide all these facilities to the aging population.

But I am a strong advocate of having elderly people.It is blessing from God to have elder people.If we start taking care of them, fulfilling their wishes in their oldness.By doing this,we can make the elder community happy.If someone is happy because of you,It is a blessing from God.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You present a clear preference for the benefits of an older population, calling elderly people “a blessing” and explaining that they can share experience and advice. You also recognise disadvantages, including pressure on government spending and the need for younger workers in some fields. However, the response only partially develops the comparison asked for: the benefits are mainly expressed as personal or moral claims, while the costs are described more concretely. The discussion of technology and older people’s ability to work is also broad and unsupported. To strengthen the response, explain how older people contribute to society—for example, through caregiving, volunteering, or passing on skills—and weigh these contributions directly against public costs before reaching your conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, discussion of benefits, discussion of disadvantages, and a concluding preference. This helps the reader identify your main position. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven, and several ideas are repeated, especially the claim that elderly people are “a blessing from God.” Linking expressions such as “Furthermore” are repeated or do not always show a clear relationship between ideas. Some sentences are also joined or separated in ways that interrupt the flow, such as “Old home is the place where elderly people enjoy their old lifeFurthermore”. Use clear paragraph breaks and organise each paragraph around one main point, then explain and illustrate it. More precise links between the advantages and disadvantages would make the argument easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “elderly population,” “expenditures,” “health care,” and “development.” This gives you a basic range for discussing ageing and government responsibilities. However, vocabulary is limited and several choices or collocations are inaccurate, which sometimes makes the meaning less clear. Examples include “good advices,” “hard works,” “old homes,” and “for the progressive working.” There are also spelling errors, such as “contruc tions,” and repeated use of “blessing” and “elderly people.” Aim to learn topic-specific phrases in context and check whether nouns are countable and whether words naturally combine. More precise terms would help you express the economic and social effects of ageing clearly.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt some longer structures, including “If we start taking care of them…” and sentences beginning with “Because” and “Furthermore.” However, the range remains limited, and complex attempts are often incomplete or inaccurately formed. For example, “Which tends to great increase…” is a sentence fragment, while “If we start taking care of them, fulfilling their wishes…” does not complete its conditional structure. Errors in articles, agreement, and sentence boundaries also occur, as in “a advantage,” “the technology have become,” and the run-on passage about old homes and facilities. These problems sometimes make the reader pause to interpret your meaning. Practise building complete sentences with a clear subject and verb, and check punctuation and agreement when editing.

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