Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-26

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

In recent years, average life span of some countries has been increased from the previous years. Mnay people argue that elderly people create problem for the government, while others contend that these people are beneficial for the society. This essay will discuss a few pros and cons of the aging population.

People argue that the elderly people are seen as a problem to the government. This is because the government is responsible to take care of them by providing pension. For instance, many countries like Italy have the highest population aged above 65, but the government have few pension funds which was introduced decades ago. Lack of pension funds cause problems in the society as older people rely only on that money. Despite some financial issues, elderly people are very essential for the society.

As youth and adults do not have spare time to conttribute to the society, many eldery people like to volunter in different societal activities. For example, activities like plantations, managing cultural events and charity work are quite popular among the people who want to provide benefit to the society. Another advantage of elderly people is that they help in household work and childcare. Although adults are busy in earning money for the family, children are supervised by the grandparents. Having ealderly people at home provide sense of security and calmness, as they have a specific routine they creates an example of a disciplined life style.

In conclusion, the elderly people might create some problems for the government, but they enrich the society with their presence. Although there are many advantages for having old people at home or in neighbours, it will always outweigh the disadvantages of them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and make your position clear: although older people may create financial pressure, you believe their benefits outweigh the disadvantages. The pension example gives the disadvantage some relevant support, while volunteering, childcare and household help provide several benefits. However, the discussion is uneven: the financial point is brief, and the benefits are mostly listed rather than explained in depth. The claim that governments have “few pension funds” is also unclear as support for the broader issue of an aging population. To strengthen the response, explain more precisely how these contributions benefit society and compare their importance with the costs before reaching your conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure, with an introduction, a paragraph on a disadvantage, a paragraph on benefits and a concluding position. The progression from government costs to older people’s contributions is easy to follow, and signposts such as “For instance,” “Another advantage” and “In conclusion” help guide the reader. This meets the lower-band expectations securely and shows some stronger control through purposeful paragraphing. However, connections between points can feel mechanical, and the final paragraph repeats the general contrast without drawing together the specific arguments. Some references, such as “these people” and “that money,” could be more precise. Use transitions that show comparison and consequence, and link each example explicitly to your overall judgement.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use enough topic-related vocabulary to communicate the main ideas, including “pension,” “volunteer,” “charity work,” “childcare” and “supervised.” There are also attempts at less common expressions, such as “sense of security” and “disciplined life style,” though some combinations are not natural or precise. Noticeable spelling errors—including “Mnay,” “conttribute,” “eldery” and “ealderly”—reduce accuracy, while phrases such as “provide benefit to the society” and “population aged above 65” need more idiomatic wording. The range is adequate for the topic, but precision and control are inconsistent. Check spelling carefully and learn common collocations for discussing public spending and older people’s social contributions.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You use a mix of simple and complex forms, including a contrast clause beginning “Although adults are busy…” and a reason introduced by “This is because…”. Most ideas remain understandable, but some grammatical errors occur in verb forms, agreement, articles and sentence construction. For example, “the government have” should use singular agreement, and “Having elderly people at home provide” needs a singular verb. In “a specific routine they creates,” the relative clause also has an agreement error, and the final sentence has an awkwardly constructed comparison. These issues do not generally prevent understanding, but they limit accuracy. Review subject–verb agreement and practise checking each clause for a clear subject and correctly formed verb.

See this exact question answered at other band scores. The same prompt compared across bands.

Browse more IELTS Writing model answers or get your own writing scored by the same AI examiner.