Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Aged persons are the fundamental unit of any well-developed society and now their respect on decline in most of countries. Some people argue that people above 70 generates a several problems for governments while some other believe they are much benificial for the society and young people development. It has several pros and cons and i will explain it in the paragraphs below.

On the one hand, there are lot of positives of older people in society. To begin with, when old persons are available in our homes then our children learn a lot of moral activities from their grandparents because they have lot of life experience and they know those things that we do not know and in this way our children are able to learn how to deal with other society like how to talk. For instance, one of my neighbour his parents died in accident his nururing done by his grandfather everyone in the society impessive with his behaviour no one listen a single abuse from his mouth. Furthermore, aged persons are the beauty of society everyone give respect to them.

On the other hand, it also have some negatives, Fistly, when there are lot of aged person in society government would pay a lot of funds to them because some well-developed countries give proper pension to person`s those are above 60 so, it would disturb government whole budget. Secoundly, mostly older people suffer from serious diseases and require lot of doctors for treating them and doctor would have to spend amount of time on them rather then treating children and young people those are the future fo nation.

To put it into a nutshell, there are many advantages and disadvatages of over population of aged persons. I think aged persons are benificial for society and its positives outweigh its negatives because the cons are countable but its advantages are countless.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0

You address both sides of the question and give a clear overall view: you believe the benefits of older people outweigh the disadvantages. The examples about grandparents teaching children and governments paying pensions are relevant, and the response stays focused on the topic. However, the extent of your judgement is not fully explained: the conclusion says the advantages are “countless” and the disadvantages “countable,” but does not compare their importance. Some points also need fuller development. For example, the claim that older people are “the beauty of society” is not explained, while the healthcare and pension costs could be supported with clearer consequences or examples. Develop these ideas and make the comparison more explicit.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall arrangement: an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, a paragraph on disadvantages, and a conclusion. The contrast between “On the one hand” and “On the other hand” helps readers follow the main direction, and examples are placed with the relevant points. This meets the lower-band expectations and shows some features of stronger progression. However, links within paragraphs are sometimes mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “because,” “and,” and “Furthermore.” Some references are also unclear, as in “it also have some negatives,” where “it” does not clearly identify the aging population. Use more precise referencing and connect each example explicitly to the point it supports.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “pension,” “government budget,” “life experience,” and “serious diseases,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. There are also attempts at less common expressions, such as “fundamental unit” and “outweigh its negatives.” However, the range is limited and several noticeable word-choice, collocation, word-form, and spelling errors make parts difficult to read: “aged persons,” “moral activities,” “nururing,” “impessive,” and “disadvatages.” Some phrases are also unnatural, such as “respect on decline” and “spend amount of time on them.” Build a more accurate set of expressions for discussing older people, social contributions, and public-service costs, and check spelling carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and longer sentences, including explanations with “because” and a contrast between benefits and costs. This gives the response some structural variety, and the main message can usually be understood. However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence boundaries recur. For example, “people above 70 generates” has a subject–verb agreement problem, while “it also have some negatives” and “everyone give respect” show similar issues. The sentence beginning “For instance, one of my neighbour…” is difficult to follow because its clauses are not clearly connected. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a clearly linked supporting clause, then check agreement and punctuation.

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