Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-27

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

Aging is the most real phenomenon in life from which every person who reached that stage have to experience. Aging decreases the neurological and physical abilities of people making them dependant on others in daily life activties. On the basis of this, some people believe that aging creates problems for gverments. There is also another group which believe that society can get benefit from elderly people.

According to science, as it is mentioned earlier, aging makes a person weak in functional and cognitive ways. The government needs its population to work hard for the benefit of the country. Any government wants to spend its resources wisely. When people get old and unable to make a livelihood, it becomes goverments' responsibility to provide them enough resources to live. If there is a increase in old population, then governing bodies will have less man power. It creates a burden on the exisiting resources with a fear of scarce. That's why some people believe that old age is a burden for the government.

Old people are treasure for the society. They can be helpful to other people from their eperience in vast variery of life aspects. It is said that one should learn from his experienced folks. With old age, there comes a calmness and deep knowledge of life. If one can utilize the experience of his old people in his life , he will gain success. So, it is believed that young society will have a in benefit with more elderly people.

If we look broadly at these two aspects, i think disadvantages are outweighing the advanatges here. The population pyramids of developed countries mostly show us that man power is necessary to grow. With a increase in old age and decrease in mortality, most of the population of a country will mainly consist of elderly. It will introduce a downfall for any population in terms of development. The government should make laws to reduce the effect of aging on its developmental rate like making education compulsory for everyone or installing home industries so that elderly can work st home with ease.

AI examiner evaluation

CriterionBand
Task Achievement / Task Response5.5
Coherence and Cohesion5.5
Lexical Resource5.5
Grammatical Range and Accuracy5.5
Overall5.5

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question and state a position: you conclude that the disadvantages outweigh the advantages. The discussion of government costs and reduced workforce is relevant, as is the point that older people can share experience. However, the position is not fully consistent: the introduction presents both views without indicating your own stance, and the conclusion’s claim that disadvantages outweigh benefits is not supported by a direct comparison. Several points remain general—for example, the benefits of older people’s experience are not illustrated with a specific situation, and the proposed policies are not clearly linked to reducing the effects of an aging population. Develop fewer ideas with clearer explanations and examples, and make your judgement explicit from the beginning.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs for disadvantages and advantages, and a concluding paragraph. This helps the reader identify the main sections. However, progression between ideas is sometimes unclear or mechanical. Phrases such as “According to science, as it is mentioned earlier” do not establish a useful link, while “If we look broadly at these two aspects” introduces a conclusion that does not clearly compare the arguments already presented. Some references are also vague, such as “his experienced folks” and “its developmental rate.” Use more precise linking and referencing, and organise each body paragraph around one main claim followed by explanation and an example.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “cognitive,” “resources,” “population pyramids,” and “developmental rate,” and the reader can generally understand your intended meaning. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the argument awkward: “a fear of scarce,” “a in benefit,” and “man power” are examples. Spelling errors such as “gverments,” “exisiting,” and “experiece” also reduce accuracy. Aim for more natural phrases and check spelling carefully. For instance, you could describe pressure on public services, a shrinking workforce, or the contribution older people make through their experience, rather than relying on broad or unclear wording.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including conditional forms such as “If one can utilize the experience … he will gain success” and clauses beginning “When people get old.” However, errors in agreement, articles, verb forms, and sentence construction are frequent enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. Examples include “every person who reached that stage have to experience,” “there is a increase,” and “disadvantages are outweighing.” The final sentence also contains a faulty construction: “so that elderly can work st home.” Practise checking subject–verb agreement, article use, and complete sentence patterns. More accurate control of these basics would make your ideas clearer while allowing you to retain the complex structures you are attempting.

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