Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.5)

In numerous countries individuals are living longer than before.Some People thinks there are problems occuring for authorities due to aging population.While others argue there are more benefits if society has more elderly people.

Some individuals say that population of aging people creates obstacles for governments because they think authorities have to made more strict rules for elder people. As old people require more safety rules and they also need more facilities which affect the Government .Due to an increasing number of old age people there are many policies made which need more expenses to spend on an aging population .This leads to economical downfall .Owning to this government utilises money for the support of older people.The governments also focus on the healthcare facuilities made for older population because people in their old age require major support.

On the other hand,other people believe that there are numerous benefits if society has more elderly people.Because older people are gift for society as they have more experiances faced through their life and they can guide young generation in their ups and downs.They are more wise and has the knowledge of dealing with difficult circumstances .The aging population provides the many benefits to the youngsters as they pray for them and their prayers can lead us to succes .Also they advise their family members so that they can cope up with complications faced in their daily life.And the old people have better ability to decide because they are good in decision making and can guide their childern in difficult times.

In conclusion,there are more advantages of having elder people in society and we can gain a lot of benefits from them because they are our biggest supporter in every phase of life.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.5

You address both sides of the question and make your position clear in the conclusion: you believe the benefits of older people outweigh the problems. The discussion of government costs and healthcare is relevant, as are the points about older people sharing experience and advising younger generations. However, the response only partly develops the comparison required by “to what extent.” The disadvantages are described mainly as spending and economic decline, without explaining their scale or weighing them directly against the social benefits. Some benefits, such as older people’s prayers, are asserted rather than explained as a broader societal advantage. Develop fewer points with specific reasoning or examples, and make the extent of your judgement clear throughout, not only in the conclusion.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.0

The response has a recognisable overall structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for disadvantages and advantages, and a conclusion. The contrast between the two main views is easy to follow, and phrases such as “On the other hand” help signal the shift. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes list-like: the benefits paragraph moves from experience to prayers, family advice, and decision-making without showing how these points connect or which is most important. Some linking is mechanical, and sentence boundaries are not consistently clear. Group related ideas, use pronouns and transitions to show relationships, and make the conclusion synthesize the comparison rather than simply repeat that older people are supportive.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “aging population,” “healthcare,” “policies,” and “decision making,” so the main ideas are generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, which makes parts of the response less natural. For example, “more strict rules for elder people” does not clearly express the intended need for support or safety measures, while “economical downfall” is an imprecise description of the effect of public spending. There are also noticeable spelling and word-form errors, such as “experiances,” “facuilities,” and “childern.” Build precision by learning common collocations for public costs, care provision, and intergenerational knowledge, and proofread spelling.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentences, including clauses introduced by “because” and “which,” and the overall meaning can usually be followed. However, the range is limited, and errors recur in sentence construction, agreement, verb forms, articles, and punctuation. For instance, “Some People thinks” has incorrect subject–verb agreement, and “authorities have to made” uses the wrong verb form after “have to.” The opening “Because older people are gift for society” is a fragment, while several sentences run together after full stops or commas. Practise building complete sentences with accurate clause links, and check agreement, articles, and verb patterns before submitting.

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