Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-30

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

Nowadays,in many nations,individuals are living longer than ever before.Many people are arguing that an aging persons create problems for government.Some portion of people think there are advantages if society has more aged persons.

I think people are living longer because they are now concern about balance diet,health issues and exercises also.These things help a person to lead a healthy life.And if one is able to lead a healthy life,he/she can live a long time than the preious.

There are some advantages of this side.An aged person is a great benefit for the society and the younger people also.Elder people can give us the knowledge that we are not able to knoe before.Acquiring knowledge from them helps us in our working life,society and also our personal life.

On the other hand, some portion of individuals believe that elderly people are creating more issues for the government of a nation.They may be think the aged people don't have job and most of them also retired from their job because of their age.They also believe that aged people are not able to help a nation because of their heath issues.The reason for this is eleder people will be suffer from many diseases for aging weakness.

So,in the conclusion,there are some advantages and disadvantages of living longer people than before.But in my opinion elder people are not unusable person.They are the key house of acquiring great knowledge for the society ,individuals and also the government of nation.We should take care of them.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 4.5

You address both sides of the question by mentioning older people’s knowledge as a benefit and their health needs and retirement as possible government challenges. However, the response does not clearly answer the key question of whether the advantages outweigh the disadvantages: the conclusion says there are advantages and disadvantages, but does not compare their importance or state a firm extent. The reasons are also only briefly explained; for example, you say elders share knowledge but give no specific example of how this benefits society. The opening explanation of why people live longer does not directly help assess the advantages and disadvantages. The response is 248 words, below the required 250. To strengthen the answer, state your position clearly and develop each main point with explanation or a relevant example.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for benefits and drawbacks, and a conclusion. Connectors such as “On the other hand” and “So, in the conclusion” help signal the shift between sections. However, the overall progression is limited because the opening body paragraph discusses why people live longer rather than developing the task’s comparison, and the conclusion mostly repeats that both sides exist. Some linking is repetitive or awkward, and references such as “this side” are not fully clear. Paragraphs are separated, but the ideas within them need more logical development. Organise the essay around a clear position, then use each paragraph to explain one reason and show how it supports your judgement.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary, including “aging population,” “retired,” “diseases,” and “acquiring knowledge,” so the topic is generally understandable. However, the range is limited and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate, sometimes making the meaning unclear. For instance, “an aged person is a great benefit” and “key house of acquiring great knowledge” do not express the intended ideas naturally; “elderly people can be a valuable resource” and “a source of valuable knowledge” would be clearer. There are also spelling errors such as “preious,” “knowe,” “heath,” and “eleder.” Build a more precise set of phrases for discussing public costs, experience, and social contributions, and check spelling and word forms carefully.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including conditional structures such as “if one is able to lead a healthy life” and a reason clause beginning “The reason for this is…”. However, the range is limited, and errors occur frequently in sentence construction, agreement, verb forms, and punctuation. Examples include “an aging persons create,” “they may be think,” and “elder people will be suffer”; these should be revised to forms such as “an aging population creates,” “they may think,” and “elderly people may suffer.” Missing spaces after punctuation and inconsistent comma use also affect readability. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and modal verb patterns, then combine ideas using controlled complex sentences and proofread each sentence.

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