Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 5.0)

In many countries, individuals are now surviving longer than ever before. People have different opinions about this. Some say an aging population which keeps increasing individuals creates issues for governments but other think there are benefits if society has more elderly people. There are both advantages and disadvantages to this issue.

On the one hand, if population keeps increasing day by day, it might create several issues for the country itself. Every country has specific amount of landscape where individuals live scatterdly. If people keep living longer than they are supposed to and they keep having babies which eventually increases the population, it will be a huge problem for the government. Because if individuals keep increasing, then they need more and more basic things which they have to rely on to survive. For instance, the government need to provide lands to build home for the individuals which will be a issue in future. They also need water supplies, electricity and many more basic needs which will be tough to provide to every citizens if the population is wider than it supposed to.

On the other hand, the society needs elder people who can tell stories about our history and culture. If elderly people die too early, we might lose the authentic stories about our history. Also, we hear many stories from our grandparents about their young lifestyle. Thus, we can have a sense of idea how their lives were different from ours. Morever, every country have their own different cultural diversity. We need elder individuals who can carry the authenticity. For instance, there are thousand numbers of stories about history all over the world, and if our forefathers didn't survive enough to tell us the stories, we would have never known about anything.

Consequently, we have both pros and cons about the people living longer now. But I personally thing the advantages of this issue outweigh the disadvantages. Without the elderly people, we might not function our society, cultures properly.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both sides of the question and state a position in the conclusion: “the advantages of this issue outweigh the disadvantages.” However, the response only partially answers the specific question about an aging population. The main disadvantage paragraph focuses on population growth, babies, and pressure on land and basic services, rather than explaining problems caused specifically by a larger proportion of elderly people. The benefits paragraph gives relevant cultural examples, such as grandparents sharing history, but does not explain these benefits in much depth or compare their importance with the disadvantages. Develop points directly related to aging, such as pension and healthcare costs alongside older people’s knowledge or contributions, and make the comparison behind your position clearer.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure, with an introduction, separate paragraphs beginning “On the one hand” and “On the other hand,” and a concluding opinion. These signposts help readers identify the two sides. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes repetitive or unclear: the first body paragraph moves from longer lives to having babies and then to land and supplies, without clearly connecting these points to an aging population. Phrases such as “Because if” create an awkward link, while “Consequently” does not clearly signal the final contrast or conclusion. Use topic sentences that directly state each argument, then develop it with explanation and an example. Clearer referencing and more precise transitions would make the overall progression easier to follow.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use enough vocabulary to communicate the general topic, including “aging population,” “basic needs,” “cultural diversity,” and “authenticity.” However, the range is limited and several choices are imprecise or repetitive, which sometimes makes the intended meaning less clear. For example, “population keeps increasing day by day” does not accurately describe population aging, and “a sense of idea” is an awkward expression. “Landscape” is also not the natural word for the amount of land available for housing. Spelling errors such as “scatterdly” and “Morever” further affect accuracy. Aim for more precise topic vocabulary and natural collocations, especially when discussing older people and the pressures they may create for governments.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including conditional forms such as “If elderly people die too early, we might lose…” and clauses introduced by “who.” However, complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to make some sentences difficult to follow. Examples include “other think” and “Every country have,” where subject–verb agreement is incorrect, and “the government need to provide lands,” which also has agreement problems. Articles and sentence construction are inconsistent in phrases such as “will be a issue” and “Because if individuals keep increasing.” Practise checking agreement, articles, and complete sentence structure, and break long or tangled sentences into clearer units while retaining some varied sentence forms.

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