Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-31

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.

To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

Student answer (Band 6.0)

Some people argue that elderly population creates problems for governments in many countries, but there are conflicting views as some people thinks elderly people as benficial for the society.There are some advantages and disadvantages of having older poeple in the society.

One major advantage of aging population is that they share valuable life experinces and knowledge. This is because they have better knowlege and experinces than the younger ones. Also they are much better in decision making than youger ones. As a result they guide youger generation for the life success. For instance, many scientist around the world are older people around 60 and 70 they are the trainers of young scientists. Furthermore older generation is valuable for preserve cultural values and traditions. they can pass their knowledge to younger generations to preserve cultural values. This ultimately helps to preserve country's cultural identity.

However aging population can creates some drawbacks to the society. Often these older generations are lack of knowledge about the technology and innovations. This is because they are more adopted to the traditional equipements and methods As a result, technological advancement can be typically slow due to slow adoptation of older generation. Also governments should alllow more funds for the well being of elderly people. This is because they vulnerable for health issues. therefore society with more elderly people may be a financial burden for governments.

In conclusion, although aging population creates problems for governments, i believe that the advantages of the elderly people outweigh its disadvantages on the society.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.5

You address both sides of the question and make your position clear in the conclusion: you believe the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The points about older people sharing experience, guiding younger generations and preserving cultural identity are relevant, as are the concerns about technology and government spending on healthcare. This covers the task, but the comparison of how far the benefits outweigh the costs is not fully developed. For example, the claim that older people are better at decision-making and the example of older scientists would be stronger with clearer explanation or specific support. To strengthen the response, explain the scale or conditions of the financial burden and directly weigh it against the social contributions you describe.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5

The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on advantages, a paragraph on disadvantages and a conclusion. The contrast signalled by “However” helps readers follow the shift between sides, and “As a result” generally shows cause and effect. Some links are repetitive or mechanical, particularly the repeated use of “This is because” and “As a result.” There are also places where the relationship between ideas could be clearer: the example of scientists does not fully explain the broader claim that older people guide younger generations. Improve progression by grouping related points, making each example explicitly support its main idea, and using more varied but precise transitions and reference words.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.5

You use relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “cultural identity,” “technological advancement,” “financial burden” and “preserve.” These choices show an attempt to discuss the issue beyond very basic terms. However, the range and control are uneven, and noticeable spelling and word-choice errors sometimes make the phrasing less clear, such as “benficial,” “experinces,” “adoptation” and “equipements.” Some combinations are also unnatural, including “elderly population” and “allow more funds.” Aim to learn accurate collocations and check spelling carefully. More precise expressions for older people’s contributions and the costs of public support would help you express your ideas with greater flexibility.

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.5

You attempt a mix of simple and complex sentences, using structures such as “This is because…” and “although…” to explain reasons and contrast ideas. The overall meaning is usually understandable, but some grammatical errors recur. For example, “some people thinks” has subject–verb disagreement, “aging population can creates” uses an incorrect verb form, and “they vulnerable for health issues” is missing a verb and has an inaccurate grammatical pattern. Articles and sentence boundaries also need attention, as in “preserve country's cultural identity” and the run-on transition after “methods.” Review agreement, verb forms, articles and punctuation, then proofread each sentence to ensure its clauses are complete and correctly joined.

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