Band 4.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 4.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-10-31
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 4.5)
In contemporary society, the population increases day by day. Some members of the public believe that the life expectancy of people are now longer than before which raises challenges for authorities, while others agrue that there are benefits of having elderly in the society. In my opinion, here advantages of having an aging population outweigh the diadvantages because elderly are essential part of society, their grandchildren get know about life from them.
On the one hand, the elderly people play a major role in an individual's life. For instance, in my childhood I spent lots of time with my grandparents they taught me many things such as how to take decisions and critical thinking. Additionally, few things we learn from our surroundings and few from our parents and grandparents.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 3.5 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 4.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 4.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 3.5
You state a clear position: the advantages outweigh the disadvantages, and you offer a relevant personal example about learning from your grandparents. However, the response addresses the task only partially. It explains one benefit, but does not identify or discuss any disadvantages, compare the two sides, or develop why elderly people benefit society beyond their role in teaching grandchildren. The response also contains 121 words, so it is 129 words short of the required minimum; the eight words copied from the prompt are not counted. This leaves too little space to support your position with reasons and examples. To improve, discuss at least one government-related challenge and explain why the benefits outweigh it, using developed examples.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 4.5
The response has a basic overall structure: an introduction gives your view, followed by a paragraph beginning “On the one hand” that introduces a supporting point. Linking expressions such as “For instance” and “Additionally” help show examples and additions. However, the progression is limited because the response ends after one body paragraph, with no contrasting discussion or conclusion to bring the argument together. The opening sentence also moves from population growth to life expectancy without clearly connecting those ideas. Develop a separate paragraph for the disadvantages and use a concluding sentence to restate your comparison. Make sure each paragraph has one clear purpose and that linking phrases express the relationship between ideas accurately.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “life expectancy,” “challenges for authorities,” “elderly,” and “critical thinking.” These choices show an attempt to discuss aging and its social effects rather than relying only on very basic words. However, the range is narrow for the task, and several word choices or collocations are inaccurate or awkward, such as “the population increases day by day,” “benefits of having elderly,” and “get know about life.” Spelling errors in “agrue” and “diadvantages” also reduce accuracy. Build a wider set of precise terms for both sides of the issue, such as pension costs, healthcare demand, experience, and intergenerational support, and check spelling and natural word combinations.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more extended sentence forms, including a contrast in the introduction and an example introduced by “For instance.” Meaning is generally understandable, but errors in agreement, articles, and sentence boundaries are noticeable. For example, “the life expectancy of people are” should use a singular verb, and “elderly are essential part” needs an article and a more complete noun phrase. The sentence about childhood and grandparents also needs punctuation to separate its clauses. The range remains limited, and the longer constructions are not consistently controlled. Practise accurate subject–verb agreement and article use, and build complex sentences with clear clause boundaries, checking each sentence for a complete and correctly punctuated structure.
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