Band 5.5 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 5.5 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-02
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 5.5)
In recent years in various countries people live longer than before, some individuals argue that older population make challenges for government, while other believe also there are advantages for having aging people. Although there are some benefits, I believe aging population creates economic and social challenges, so disadvantages outweigh advantages. In addition,labor shortages: fewer working-age citizens lead to reduced productivity, slower economic growth, and strained industries.
On the one hand, some people believe having elder population creates healthcare strain, older adults require more medical treatment, long term care, and management of chronic illness draining public funds. Furthermore, fiscal pressure; government face rising pension payouts and social welfare costs while a shrinking tax base pays for them. For instance if there will be older population then government have to pay them Pension, if they weren't there the same amount goes for children schooling or young adults scholarships they can make their future bright.
On the other hand, some benefits of having elder population, wisdom and mentorship; senior citizen offer valuable life experience, career guidance and historical knowledge to younger generations. For example they tell young people to not do things that can harm us because they have experience it or they give cultural knowledge or historical.
In conclusion, although elder people can guide youngsters with their life experiences but their healthcare strain and slow productivity in industry are outweighing advantages.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 5.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 5.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 5.5 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0
You give a clear overall view: “disadvantages outweigh advantages,” and you address both sides by discussing healthcare and pension costs, labour shortages, and older people’s wisdom. However, the response only partially develops the task. The disadvantages receive more explanation, while the benefit of mentorship is supported mainly by a brief, general example; the comparison of how far the advantages outweigh the disadvantages is not explored in depth. The pension example about money being redirected to children’s schooling is also unclear and does not fully explain the trade-off. The response is 21 words below the required minimum, which limits the space available to develop your reasons. Extend each main point with a specific explanation or relevant example.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5
The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, a paragraph on disadvantages, one on benefits, and a conclusion. Signposting such as “On the one hand,” “On the other hand,” and “In conclusion” helps readers follow the broad contrast. However, progression within paragraphs is uneven. The introduction abruptly adds “In addition, labor shortages” after stating your position, and the disadvantages paragraph shifts from healthcare to pensions and then to schooling without clearly connecting these points. Some linking is mechanical, and the final sentence repeats the main position rather than drawing the comparison together. Use one clear topic sentence per paragraph, group related reasons, and add explicit links explaining how each example supports your argument.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some relevant topic vocabulary, including “labor shortages,” “productivity,” “chronic illness,” “pension payouts,” and “mentorship.” These choices show an attempt to discuss the issue beyond basic everyday language. However, the range is limited and several phrases are awkward or imprecise, such as “older population,” “elder population,” “healthcare strain,” and “make their future bright.” Repetition of “elder” and “government” also reduces flexibility. Some word forms and collocations make the meaning less natural, for example “senior citizen offer” and “they have experience it.” Aim for precise, conventional expressions and vary how you refer to older people and public costs. The vocabulary communicates the main ideas, but errors and limited flexibility are noticeable.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more complex sentences, including the contrast structure “Although there are some benefits, I believe…” and the clause beginning “while a shrinking tax base pays for them.” However, the range is limited, and complex attempts are often faulty. Examples include “older population make challenges,” “other believe,” and “government face,” where subject–verb agreement is missing. There are also problems with articles and sentence boundaries, as in “In recent years in various countries people live longer than before, some individuals argue…”. The example beginning “For instance if there will be older population” has an inaccurate conditional form and unclear sentence structure. Practise accurate agreement, articles, and punctuation, then build longer sentences from these reliable patterns.
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