Band 6.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer
Overall Band Score: 6.0 · Cambridge IELTS 18 · 2026-11-03
IELTS Writing Task 2 question
In many countries, people are now living longer than ever before. Some people say an aging population creates problems for governments. Other people think there are benefits if society has more elderly people.
To what extent do the advantages of having an aging population outweigh the disadvantages?
Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.
Student answer (Band 6.0)
The rising number of elderly people has become a considerable debate over the years. People contain different opinions over this topic, some argue that the surging number of aged people creates problems for governments while other provides various reasons of how it is beneficial to have more elderly people in society.
To begin with, the arguement of increasing number of old people in many countries has rose rapidly. Many says that this increase has increased the health care as well as the old age house expenses which are funded by government. On the other hand a noticeable amount of elderly people docnot earn which makes them a non tax payer so government is not getting anything back from elderly people but it has to pay for the take care of elderly people.
However, if we look at the contribution of these elderly people for the society and the country, we cannot neglect the fact that they had given the country and the society too much. If it is in the fact of taxes, services, support in army and the patriotism for their country. We also cannot neglect the moral reasons for respecting elderly people. For instance, they have more life experrience, they think cognitively and the fact that they have valueable lessons for life which are significant for the young generation. Elderly people have good ability of decision making so they plays a vital role in the growth for any country or society.
To conclude, the advantages of having elderly people always outweighs the disadvantages because the are also an asset for the country and morally it is important that these people should be treated respectfully and gently.
AI examiner evaluation
| Criterion | Band |
|---|---|
| Task Achievement / Task Response | 6.0 |
| Coherence and Cohesion | 6.5 |
| Lexical Resource | 5.5 |
| Grammatical Range and Accuracy | 5.0 |
| Overall | 6.0 |
Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 6.0
You address both sides of the question and give a clear overall position: you acknowledge public healthcare and care costs, then conclude that older people are an asset and that the advantages outweigh the disadvantages. The discussion of their experience, lessons for younger generations, and decision-making ability is relevant. However, the advantages are developed more fully than the disadvantages, and some claims need explanation. For example, the statement that elderly people contributed through “taxes, services, support in army” does not clarify how these past contributions benefit society now. To strengthen the response, explain the scale or consequences of the costs and support your main reasons with a specific example, while making the comparison between benefits and drawbacks more explicit.
Coherence and Cohesion: Band 6.5
The response has a clear overall structure: an introduction, a paragraph on costs, a paragraph on benefits, and a conclusion. The contrast signposts “To begin with,” “On the other hand,” and “However” help readers follow the main direction, and the final paragraph restates your position. This meets the lower-band expectation of coherent overall arrangement and shows some stronger control through paragraphing and progression. However, links within sentences are sometimes awkward, and the benefits paragraph moves quickly from past contributions to moral respect, experience, and decision-making without clearly showing how each point supports the argument. Use clearer topic sentences and connect each supporting point to the claim that the advantages outweigh the costs.
Lexical Resource: Band 5.5
You use some topic-relevant vocabulary, including “aging population,” “health care,” “tax payer,” “life experience,” and “decision making.” There are also attempts at more formal expressions such as “a vital role” and “significant for the young generation.” However, the range is limited and several inaccurate or unnatural choices make parts of the argument harder to understand, such as “People contain different opinions,” “increasing number … has rose,” and “the take care of elderly people.” Spelling errors such as “arguement,” “experrience,” and “valueable” also reduce accuracy. Aim for more natural collocations and check word forms and spelling; this will make your ideas clearer and more precise.
Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0
You attempt both simple and more complex sentence forms, including a contrast structure beginning “while” and a conditional phrase beginning “If it is in the fact of taxes.” The overall meaning is usually recoverable, but control is uneven, and errors in verb forms, agreement, and sentence construction sometimes make the reader pause. For example, “the surging number … creates” is followed by “other provides,” and “they plays” does not agree in number. The sentence beginning “If it is in the fact of taxes” is incomplete, while “they had given” uses an unsuitable tense for the intended general point. Practise building complete sentences around one main idea, and check subject–verb agreement and verb tense before adding complex clauses.
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