Band 5.0 IELTS Writing Task 2 Model Answer

Overall Band Score: 5.0 · Cambridge IELTS 12 · 2026-11-13

IELTS Writing Task 2 question

Some people say that parents should encourage their children to take part in organised group activities in their free time. Others say that it is important for children to learn how to occupy themselves on their own.

Discuss both these views and give your own opinion.

Give reasons for your answer and include any relevant examples from your own knowledge or experience.

 

Student answer (Band 5.0)

People have different opinions about envolving parents to choose what their children have to do in theire free time , while some believe that they must encouraging their children to spend time doing some activities, others argue that leaving them choose or occupy themselves on their own way a good idea.

on the one hand, supporters of encouraging children to take part in organised group, believe that this way can work for their children to do some usefull activities in their free time.

This is mainly because on these days children prefer to scoll, or play all day in the phone.

for instance, they can choose an activity to spend time on it, like playing puzzle or domino.

On the other hand, those who support that children should occupy themselves on their own, argue that this way work better, because this way let to children the free-well to choose what they really want to do.

One reason for this, is that way could help children become independant in the future and learn how and when take the right decisions.

for example, if they face some difficult situations in the future, they can manage them, thanks to the parents who left them their free -well to do all whatthey want .

In conclusion, although both views have their advantages, i believe that is important to let children occupy their free time on their own, because this way could help their personality to become more and more impressive, also they can earn some skills.

AI examiner evaluation

Task Achievement / Task Response: Band 5.0

You address both views and give a clear preference in the conclusion: you favour children occupying themselves independently. The two body paragraphs also offer relevant reasons, including avoiding excessive phone use and developing independence and decision-making. However, the discussion is only partially developed. The organised-activity example of “playing puzzle or domino” is not clearly connected to group participation, and the point about future decision-making is asserted rather than explained with a specific situation. Your opinion appears most clearly at the end, so the reader gets limited explanation of why you prefer this view over organised activities. Develop each side with a more precise example and explain how it supports your argument.

Coherence and Cohesion: Band 5.5

The response has a recognisable structure: an introduction, separate paragraphs for the two views, and a conclusion. Phrases such as “on the one hand,” “on the other hand,” and “In conclusion” help signal the stages of the discussion. However, progression within paragraphs is sometimes unclear, and linking is repetitive or awkward. For example, “this way” is repeated several times in the second body paragraph, while the relationship between the phone-use point and the puzzle/domino example is not fully explained. Some sentences also run together, making the argument harder to follow. Use clearer references and connect each example explicitly to the point it illustrates; vary linking expressions rather than relying on the same phrase.

Lexical Resource: Band 5.0

You use some relevant vocabulary for the topic, including “organised group,” “free time,” “independent,” and “decisions,” so the main ideas can generally be understood. However, the range is limited and several noticeable spelling and word-choice errors make the writing less clear or natural. Examples include “envolving,” “scoll,” “usefull,” “independant,” and “free-well.” Phrases such as “work better” and “become more and more impressive” are also vague or unsuitable for the intended meaning. Aim for accurate topic-specific expressions and check spelling carefully. More precise wording would help you explain the benefits of group activities and independent play without repeating general terms such as “this way.”

Grammatical Range and Accuracy: Band 5.0

You attempt both simple and complex sentences, including clauses introduced by “while,” “because,” and “if.” This gives the response some structural variety, but complex sentences are often faulty, and errors occur frequently enough to affect clarity. For example, “they must encouraging” has an incorrect verb form, and “this way work better” lacks subject–verb agreement. In “let to children the free-well,” the sentence pattern is not formed correctly; “if they face some difficult situations” also needs a plural noun form. Punctuation and capitalisation are inconsistent, particularly at sentence beginnings. Practise building accurate sentences with one main clause and a correctly formed supporting clause before adding more complexity.

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